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By anon - / Monday 5 September 2016 08:17 / New Zealand - Hamilton
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By  GhostFox  |  37

Wow, no. I get that you probably didn't mean it that way, but most people will take offense if you call them gay. Heterosexual people will because despite a lot of work towards changing it, being "gay" is still considered bad because it's "different." Homosexual people because it implies there's something about them that sticks out and "marks" them as gay. And polysexual people because of both reasons, and your erasing part of their identity. Just... Don't ask someone that unless you REALLY know them. If only because you could also accidentally out them, and that can literally endanger their life. And even if you really know them, do it in private. Also, the fact you subconsciously jumped to him being gay because of his lack of interest in you implies you have some issues in how you feel about him. He doesn't owe you his attraction anymore than you owe anyone else yours.

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By  jake131000  |  33

Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment

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  tigerisabelle  |  33

I'm old-fashioned but I consider myself a lady. I like football, although I prefer baseball more. I give a firm handshake. I'm polite. If someone calls me gay, I'll politely correct them.... Sorry. FYL for word vomit, OP, but also YDI for said word vomit.

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  Tripartita  |  33

Congrats, Jake, you've just described 80% of the gay men I've met. Nothing screams "I'm secure in my sexuality" like wasting the first comment talking about how hetero yet easily offended you are. Based on the contexts I hear it in, I'm beginning to think "old fashioned" is a euphemism for "prone to upholding stereotypes."

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"I consider myself a man," because being gay makes you less of a man? You realize all the stuff you listed can apply to gay men too. It's not like if you're gay you aren't able give firm handshakes or like football. These traits are based on individuals and their preferences, not on sexuality.

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  cheeeksss  |  33

First, you can be gay and be a man at the same time. So your whole comment was just stupid and inaccurate. Second, I consider myself a woman. I give a firm handshake. I like sports. And if someone mistook me for a lesbian, I would NOT get offended. Why? Because being gay does not make one a worse person, nor less of a human being. Stop being a fool. You're not a man. You're still an ignorant child with that close-minded brain of yours.

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  Magnoxidans  |  33

I consider myself a male because I have a penis. I consider myself a man because that's how I identify. I consider myself an educated man because I know that saying narrow-minded shit on FML will just result in a wave of comments pointing out how ignorant I am.

By  GhostFox  |  37

Wow, no. I get that you probably didn't mean it that way, but most people will take offense if you call them gay. Heterosexual people will because despite a lot of work towards changing it, being "gay" is still considered bad because it's "different." Homosexual people because it implies there's something about them that sticks out and "marks" them as gay. And polysexual people because of both reasons, and your erasing part of their identity. Just... Don't ask someone that unless you REALLY know them. If only because you could also accidentally out them, and that can literally endanger their life. And even if you really know them, do it in private. Also, the fact you subconsciously jumped to him being gay because of his lack of interest in you implies you have some issues in how you feel about him. He doesn't owe you his attraction anymore than you owe anyone else yours.

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  Wabbajack789  |  37

Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment

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  GhostFox  |  37

Not sure whether to point out I don't use tumblr or that I didn't invite you to comment on my comment, making you just as wrong as me in your own flawed logic.

By  Nyattack  |  21

Well you said it yourself #1, you're "old-fashioned" (*cough* aka homophobic) LGBT people have their sexual orientation and/or gender incorrectly assumed and hear homophobic slurs every single day, have less laws protecting their right and general well-being, and yet they don't take offense. Please grow up, and leave your stereotypes behind ! The OP even said "in a good way", which means she associated him with the (rare) positive stereotypes about gay men, such as being sensitive and caring, well-dressed and all ; really nothing to feel insecure about !

By  tigerisabelle  |  45

Yikes, well. If you want to try and salvage this, I would text him and say "sorry about calling you gay the other day - it was my misguided way of complimenting you because I think you're really cute and you dress really well."

By  Magnoxidans  |  41

Contact him and be honest, just say you're interested in him and aren't good at those situations. Worst case you're in the same boat, best case you fix the damage.

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