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By Anonymous - / Tuesday 19 June 2018 19:00 /
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By  jbuckets_404  |  34

OP, at least now you're not on the hook to pay (monetary) child support for somebody else's kid, right? Not to mention otherwise physically caring for/ raising said newborn 'til adulthood were you two committed to staying together & married after all, no? As painful as this is, I think you dodged the proverbial bullet just in time (for multiple reasons). Good luck to you! :-)

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By  jbuckets_404  |  34

OP, at least now you're not on the hook to pay (monetary) child support for somebody else's kid, right? Not to mention otherwise physically caring for/ raising said newborn 'til adulthood were you two committed to staying together & married after all, no? As painful as this is, I think you dodged the proverbial bullet just in time (for multiple reasons). Good luck to you! :-)

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  Zekfen  |  12

Sadly this isn’t true due to state laws that assume paternity. For example, in California, if you were married and your wife has a baby, you are the presumed father and you can’t contest it, even with DNA proof showing you aren’t the father, even if you get a divorce. Many states also have laws that assume paternity that if a child is born x number of days (Alabama’s is 300), then you are the presumed father and thus responsible for child support. In most states you have up to a year after the baby is born to contest the assumption of paternity, but in some states like California you can’t.

So OP, check with your divorce lawyer on the assumed paternity laws in your state and make sure you contest it the hour the baby is born. Otherwise if you assume because you are divorced it can’t comeback to haunt you, you’ll get a nasty surprise when your ex drags you into court in a few years for child support.

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  Zekfen  |  12

You can doubt all you want, or you can go look up the laws yourself and see. I have a friend whose wife cheated on him and got pregnant, they got a divorce, child was born and state put him down as assumed father on birth certificate. Two years later she took him to court for child support and back payments. He had a DNA test to prove the child wasn’t his, state said to bad, you had one year to contest it, so even though you aren’t the biological father, you are permanently listed as the father for child support. She won and now he is paying child support until the kid is 18.

By  Chazzster  |  16

OP - It’s time to recognize the ex is no longer your wife and not your responsibility. She has a new life as do you. It’s time to move on.

While it’s awkward that the new baby daddy is your friend, at least you won’t be raising and supporting that one.

By  Rabite  |  25

People here are saying as usual that he dodged a bullet. But why?
They were separated for more than one year. What is the problem with her moving on? I mean that's the whole point of separating.
And why do you people assume that she would have cheated on him if they were not separated?
Why do you need to paint the ex-wife as some kind of bad guy?

By  manb91uk  |  20

I'm probably going to get a lot of downvotes for this but what the hell...

You and your ex-wife have been separated for over a year which means that she got pregnant after you decided to split up. Admittedly she moved on with a friend of yours but still...

Unless the grounds for divorce was that she refused to have kids with you, then I can't see the issue.

Yes, it sucks that your marriage is over, and I'm sorry, but you should try and move on as well. Stop watching her life and focus on your own.

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  Sinshine  |  19

Exactly my thoughts. They've been broken up for over a year, living in separation, going through a divorce. So at that point, she can do what she wants. It sucks for OP that it was with a friend but she didn't cheat or anything like that (as far as we know) so they're nothing that's objectively wrong.

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  Cali  |  49

Guys... I'm pretty sure the problem is that his best friend was sleeping with his estranged wife before the divorce was even finalized! Isn't that part of the bro code? You don't fuck your best friend's ex!

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