Miscellaneous: Today, I forgot what I was doing while listening to a voicemail...

By xoccerplaya - 06/10/2011 10:46 - United States

Today, I forgot what I was doing while listening to a voicemail and started talking back to it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 528

You deserved it 11 313

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Same thing different taste

By ihatelife - 14/05/2011 23:17 - Canada

Today, I was trying to listen to a phone message I'd received. I was excited because I'd been waiting for the coaches to call me back for tryouts for a week now. Trying to figure out how to listen to it, I ended up deleting it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 270

You deserved it 28 467

By Sleepy - 31/05/2015 15:51 - United States - Apo

Today, the phone kept ringing so I picked it up and answered. When there was no response, it took a minute to realize that I was still in bed and talking to my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 476

You deserved it 5 026

By anna - 22/12/2011 21:25 - France

Today, while waiting for my train, I was listening to a voicemail message on my phone. Out of nowhere, a stranger came up to me from behind and screamed "DELETE!" into my ear. His voice command deleted my message. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 936

You deserved it 4 594

Probably not

By stupid voicemails - 28/04/2013 09:09 - United States - Lahaina

Today, I missed multiple calls from the company I applied to. That was the supervisor calling, wanting to hire me. I then remembered my idiotic voicemail I made months ago where I pretended to answer and say stupid stuff for 5 minutes. I don't think I'm going to get the job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 012

You deserved it 55 210

Foiled plan

By fazzems - 07/08/2009 03:10 - Canada

Today, I had a video call with a couple of old friends, but the conversation sort of got boring, so I started mouthing words so they'd think the connection was bad and end the awkwardness. Then, as soon as they hung up the call, I realized I'd left my music on in the background the whole time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 618

You deserved it 70 861

By Anonymous - 02/09/2009 09:39 - New Zealand

Today, my boss rang me for the 5th time on my day off. Frustrated I pushed 'ignore' and yelled a string of obscenities at my phone. Turns out I pushed 'talk'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 560

You deserved it 50 912

By OverWorked1 - 20/01/2011 03:59 - United States

Today, I was talking to a co-worker about birth control. Ten minutes later, I went to my sent e-mails to copy and reuse an old e-mail and realized I had sent "I tried calling you but your birth control is not working" to a student. It was supposed to say "voicemail". FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 337

You deserved it 24 254

By Anonymous - 01/09/2013 23:55 - United States

Today, while on vacation, I called my home phone to check the messages. Someone answered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 168

You deserved it 2 821

By suspended - 09/08/2014 00:16 - Australia

Today, while I was working customer support, a lady hung up on me mid-sentence, and I trailed off, saying, "…aaannnddd you hung up on me like a bitch." Turned out she was still on the line and had just accidentally hit mute. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 627

You deserved it 41 234

What she said

By Anonymous - 05/03/2022 10:00

Today, I unknowingly left a five minute-long voicemail on my boss’s phone, at 3 a.m., while out drinking with friends. I have no idea what we were talking about at that time, but I know I don’t want my boss to have a candid recording of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 527

You deserved it 518

Btreasure 8

Thursday 6 October 2011 16:02

My brothers voice mail starts out with a conversation and goes just kidding leave a message. I fall for it everytime

mk58 31

Thursday 6 October 2011 16:03

I feel like you're one of those people who absentmindedly talk to their furniture and appliances.

Comments

naedangerdavey 0

Thursday 6 October 2011 16:08

Not really an FML tbh.

cbdee 8

Thursday 6 October 2011 16:10

No, it's a FimStupid!

BronyVasNormandy 12

Thursday 6 October 2011 16:10

Was it a voicemail from your husband's drunk-dialing best-friend?

vipirius 18

Thursday 6 October 2011 16:21

You fail at referencing past fml's. Get a life

FMMFL1992 3

Thursday 6 October 2011 16:40

I love past FML references.

FMMFL1992 3

Thursday 6 October 2011 16:11

This is more o a stupid mistake rather than an fml.

Enigmax2514 7

Thursday 6 October 2011 16:12

The stupid mistake IS the cause of the fml

cptmorgan6 8

Thursday 6 October 2011 16:13

I did that once. Then it started talking back. Creepy.... Never again.

ikickgingers 15

Thursday 6 October 2011 16:45

Mmm captain.

cptmorgan6 8

Thursday 6 October 2011 18:42

Nothing better. Funny profile.

gotaphd 6

Friday 7 October 2011 8:14

Did your phone ask if you liked scary movies?

Enigmax2514 7

Thursday 6 October 2011 16:14

I wish there was an fml where the voicemail replied

brndnzchry 1

Thursday 6 October 2011 16:16

Fml is getting whimpy and petty

Anubyte 0

Thursday 6 October 2011 16:16

I hate it when that happens, my girlfriend's house's voicemail is her sister saying "hello, this leave a message" it gets me EVERY time :(

GETOVERIT2039 0

Thursday 6 October 2011 16:22

I do that all the time

Jdeluxh 12

Thursday 6 October 2011 16:23

Was it a good conversation?

rachelmpifer 0

Thursday 6 October 2011 16:30

Why is it a "fml"? It just means your dumb

RA661 8

Thursday 6 October 2011 18:31

His dumb what?

Keywords

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The Top

Today, in the middle of an argument, my husband picked me up and sat me on our breakfast bar. I’m terrified of heights so getting down took me over 5 minutes because of how bad I was shaking. He left to meet his friends, who “don’t start arguments just because they’re bored.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 239

You deserved it 648

Today, a guy for whom I did a design job told me he would only be able to pay me in 3 weeks. I told him that it was OK, as long as I didn't have to follow him around to collect my money. "Don't worry, I know the feeling," he said, "I used to run an illegal business." FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 513

You deserved it 2 171

The Top

Today, as my girlfriend and I were making love, and she started to moan and groan. All of a sudden, she stopped and said, "I'm lying, you suck at this." FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 953

You deserved it 19 159

Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. After about five minutes, he sneezes violently on me. I don't know what's worse, him getting snot all over my intimate bits or the fact that the sneeze felt better then what he was doing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 221

You deserved it 3 198

Today, I discovered my brother likes to use our kitchen utensils to scratch his private areas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 342

You deserved it 2 318

Today, my daughter hugged me around the neck and whispered, "I'm going to cut your head off." I'm afraid to go to sleep now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 708

You deserved it 5 756

Today, I was talking to a customer and I actually fell asleep for a couple of seconds. I can honestly say she wouldn't stop talking and didn't even notice me snoring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 092

You deserved it 2 818

Today, I dropped my wedding ring on the carpet. Just as I was about to pick it up, my Roomba sucked it up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 730

You deserved it 1 730

Same thing different taste

Probably not

Foiled plan

What she said

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