Love: Today, I farted while asking a girl out to dinner. FML

By fart - 27/11/2014 15:13 - United States - Houghton Lake

Today, I farted while asking a girl out to dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 113

You deserved it 7 279

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Same thing different taste

My body hates me

By HappilyNeverAfter - 18/09/2014 03:14 - Canada - Port Perry

Today, a guy asked me out, and I felt butterflies in my stomach. I soon realized that it wasn't butterflies, but an unexpected bowel movement. I stood there awkwardly, looking him in the eyes, then farted hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 834

You deserved it 5 271

By Anonymous - 26/10/2012 07:23 - Australia - Queanbeyan

Today, I went out to a restaurant with a girl I have been dating. The only conversation was about how proud she was of her fart during work earlier, and how she managed to clear out a section of the office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 900

You deserved it 3 224

By tmac05 - 13/11/2010 05:13 - United States

Today, the waiter farted while I was on a date. My date thought it was me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 836

You deserved it 3 010

Nervous

By amelie - 09/12/2018 05:00

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me. While getting down on one knee, he farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 718

You deserved it 712

By nameless - 12/07/2009 06:45 - United States

Today, I asked the girl I am in love with out on a date. She asked me for my name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 278

You deserved it 11 856

By Anonymous - 01/03/2018 19:30 - United States - Greenville

Today, while wearing a sexy pair of undies for my partner and taking him out on a nice dinner, I trusted a fart walking from the car to the restaurant and shit myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 036

You deserved it 1 735

By oops - 04/03/2016 21:28 - United States - Mankato

Today, I accidentally farted while shopping. There was an awkward silence followed by a god-awful stink and a lady's little girl bursting into tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 034

You deserved it 3 411

By oops - 18/05/2009 04:17 - United States

Today, while I was waitressing, I bent down to pick up a menu and accidentally farted, really loud, at my table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 499

You deserved it 10 826

Bad timing, dude

By Anonymous - 24/02/2021 07:59 - Australia

Today, in the middle of asking my girlfriend to marry me, I sneezed so hard that I farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 006

You deserved it 139

By Anonymous - 13/08/2015 01:18 - United States - Kingman

Today, I let out a huge fart during a job interview. I was the one conducting the interview. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 406

You deserved it 5 191

ComoEsJuan 24

Thursday 27 November 2014 18:16

Breaking the ice by breaking wind. I'll take notes.

fuckyourlifeOP 25

Thursday 27 November 2014 18:16

That stinks!

Comments

devildog562 33

Thursday 27 November 2014 18:25

Did you just play it off and continue with the proposition? Hopefully you excused yourself or laughed at it.

DenverTyrrell 13

Thursday 27 November 2014 18:25

It happens to the best of us :) so...what did she say :P

SarahSehhati 40

Thursday 27 November 2014 18:26

Did she say yes?

julianbozikovic 20

Thursday 27 November 2014 18:27

Hopefully you guys laughed it off! Good luck OP!

granCanyon 12

Thursday 27 November 2014 18:33

If she was offended by a simple fart you're better off without her :)

trellz17 19

Thursday 27 November 2014 18:35

Tell her you have incontinence

val_is_lame97 12

Thursday 27 November 2014 18:49

oh jeez... i wonder how she took it

captainsmegma 12

Thursday 27 November 2014 18:58

If she responds with a large belch or an even nastier fart, she's a keeper. Get yo the alter quickly.

teentee401 36

Thursday 27 November 2014 19:08

It's okay OP. I bet you blew her away.

Ihavegas 22

Thursday 27 November 2014 19:11

bask in the ambience

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The Top

Today, I told my ultra-Catholic mother that I was hanging out with a girl. While walking out of the flat, I didn't realize that I'd dropped one of my condoms out of my pocket. My mother saw it and ripped it apart, then yelled at me that, "Sex is for having children! You're giving yourselves to Satan!" I'm 20. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 238

You deserved it 318

Today, I got questioned by the police. Last night I was at a party when a bully of a kid who happened to be an aspiring MMA coach and local fighter was picking on me, stole my alcohol and threw me out of the party. I heard he got stabbed by someone else he was picking on after I left. The police insist it was me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 439

You deserved it 58

The Top

Today, I came home from work to see that my dog had shit all over himself and his kennel. He eaten an entire cake when I'd left him home for 10 minutes by himself yesterday. This not how I planned to start my weekend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 156

You deserved it 751

Today, I came home and my spouse decided to bring up our past arguments. I apologized to him for the mean things I said, not conjuring his faults. I spoke to him gently and was interested in his thoughts. I validated his feelings. I was engaged in the discussion. He responded to me with, “Too little too late!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 597

You deserved it 291

Today, I noticed that the eye drops I have been using 3 times a day for the past week expired when the Jonas Brothers were popular. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 446

You deserved it 5 572

Today, my co-worker handed me a note. The note said, "If you can, please take a shower once in a while." The smell was coming from the broken bathroom next to my office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 805

You deserved it 2 668

Today, there was a forest fire in my town. I was still forced to go to school, as it was safer. A lot of people decided not to go, and we ended up doing nothing but watching the news reports. There, I got to see my house burning on live TV. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 579

You deserved it 4 656

Today, it's the second day my wife hasn’t been to work at all, because a cashier called her ma’am instead of miss. Apparently, it’s the first time this has happened and she’s so upset that she might be visibly growing old that she’s been in bed for two days crying. We’re both only 27 years-old, FFS. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 177

You deserved it 144

Same thing different taste

My body hates me

Nervous

Bad timing, dude

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