Intimacy: Today, I came to the realization I make a living trimming the...

By penisgrabber - 15/12/2010 17:07 - United States

Today, I came to the realization I make a living trimming the hair off dogs' privates. I've touched more dog penises than I have human ones, and sometimes the dogs get "excited" while I'm working. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 472

You deserved it 7 072

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Same thing different taste

By cutup - 11/07/2012 17:54 - United States - Gainesville

Today, I tried to trim my dog's nails. After about a half hour of barking, biting, and general freaking out, I gave up and decided to pay someone else to do it. I'm a vet, and do this for a living. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 517

You deserved it 6 430

By StudMuffinette - 18/07/2011 19:40 - United States

Today, I was at work when someone came in asking me to brush their pet shih tzu. After an hour of vigorously grooming through the multiple knots, I called the owner to collect their dog. When she got here she said, "Oh, did I say brush? I meant shave." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 268

You deserved it 2 975

By Anonymous - 20/06/2012 23:08 - United States - New Kensington

Today, I went to the gynecologist. As she was checking me out, she said, "Wow. So you must get wet a lot." It took me several minutes to realize she was talking about my job bathing dogs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 471

You deserved it 3 405

By workaholic - 15/02/2012 11:09 - United States

Today, while I was at work, my boyfriend decided to give my Cocker Spaniel a haircut. I now have the equivalent of an over-sized naked mole rat running around my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 258

You deserved it 3 006

By budbunny13 - 30/06/2011 23:08 - United States

Today, I saw a pink, slimy thing coming out of my dog's knob. I got really freaked out so I took him to the vet, only to find out that it was his penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 680

You deserved it 63 991

By Anonymous - 15/05/2011 04:41 - United States

Today, I realized that my pubes are longer than my penis itself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 84 704

You deserved it 26 752

By Puppylove - 26/02/2013 18:09 - United Kingdom

Today, I was at my friend's house, when she commented that her dog's fur kept getting tangled because of its length. I reached over to tickle his tummy, felt a big tangled knot and agreed that he needed a good grooming. Then I realized what I'd grabbed wasn't fur. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 902

You deserved it 10 276

By Noname - 09/03/2009 17:04 - Canada

Today, I was rubbing my dog's belly. He seemed to be enjoying it, his penis "came out". My boyfriend was walking by and said "at least you turn someone on." FML

I agree, your life sucks 82 335

You deserved it 8 682

By nickyniknaim93 - 11/03/2009 06:07 - United States

Today, I found out that the electric nose hair clippers that I've been using for the past two years are in fact my father's pubic hair trimmers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 712

You deserved it 16 993

By tbright010 - 08/04/2011 22:48 - United States

Today, the highlight of my day was learning how to drain my dog's anal glands. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 515

You deserved it 4 626

Ninjafriends 1

Wednesday 15 December 2010 23:41

I noticed that you refrained from saying that you're a dog groomer, and that you "make a living trimming the hair off dogs' privates". This implies that you specialize in the penis of dogs. Do you occasionally get requests to groom a dog and have to reply, "sorry, I only do the penis and sometimes the scrotum, you'll have to look elsewhere"? Also, don't lie. You love it.

Alzied 0

Wednesday 15 December 2010 23:28

Do you get excited too?

Comments

mapleleafs34 0

Thursday 16 December 2010 0:16

lmao!!!! ninjafriends---you made my day:)

Ninjafriends 1

Thursday 16 December 2010 0:23

Glad I could help!

lordmir 1

Thursday 16 December 2010 1:14

lol I agree plus just wanna say your cute

Ninjafriends 1

Thursday 16 December 2010 1:17

Umm, is that directed towards me, or the cute girl above me. You bastard!

brad89101112 0

Thursday 16 December 2010 12:29

damn girl ur sooo hot

serenader 2

Thursday 16 December 2010 0:40

Don't take this the wrong way, but you could -- if you wanted to -- make your living trimming the hair off of human privates. There's probably more money in that than the canine equivalent. And -- here's the bonus -- you'd no longer have to complain about having touched more dog penises than human ones. Just an idea.