Kids: Today, I came home to the nanny passed out on the couch from...

By myself - 30/01/2012 05:24 - Canada

Today, I came home to the nanny passed out on the couch from too much alcohol, my 2-year-old alone and locked in the bathroom, and my house in a complete wreck. To top it off, it's the day my mother-in-law, who hates me, is coming to visit from New York. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 357

You deserved it 3 952

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Same thing different taste

By diddlebuag - 27/05/2011 22:09 - United States

Today, I came home from work, only to find the babysitter passed out on the couch with a bottle of Jack Daniel's. At some point, it seems my son had taken the liberty of peeing on her while she slept. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 032

You deserved it 6 245

Mommy dearest

By Ohkourt - 20/04/2020 05:00

Today, I woke up only to find my half-naked drunk mother in my living room, talking in her sleep about how much she hates me. She still doesn't see what's wrong with this picture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 652

You deserved it 110

By Deadcat101 - 10/07/2012 23:26 - Canada - Winnipeg

Today, my unemployed mother decided to yet again stay home and drink heavily. So far she's kicked me out of the house, tipped over our sofa, and thrown her vibrator out the window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 038

You deserved it 1 934

Family values

By Anonymous - 19/09/2009 04:55 - United States

Today, I went back home. My drunk mother was screaming at my drunk step-dad about a fight that happened four years ago. My little sister was looking in the mirror practicing her "orgasm face", while the neighbors were dancing outside, coked out and naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 86 219

You deserved it 5 372

By liquorless - 05/11/2012 14:02 - Canada - Hamilton

Today, my girlfriend's mother came over for a few hours. After she left I went to grab a drink, only to find that three bottles of expensive liquor were missing from our liquor cabinet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 166

You deserved it 1 934

By mariama - 23/01/2013 17:45 - United States

Today, I visited my family. Over the course of 2 hours, my brother punched me, and my mom slapped me across the face after drinking way too much wine. When I started gathering my things to leave, my mom started crying about how I don't visit enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 997

You deserved it 3 119

By Anonymous - 21/05/2014 16:05 - United States - New York

Today, I woke to my drunk mother trying to vacuum the lawn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 851

You deserved it 4 365

Parasite

By Anonymous - 13/09/2023 04:00

Today, and since we've had our baby, my mother-in-law started coming round more often, then bringing her stuff to stay overnight, then started claiming she lived here, and got hysterical when we told her she doesn’t. I had to pick her up and place her outside while she punched me in the head repeatedly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 959

You deserved it 87

By Julie - 25/12/2012 03:20 - United States - East Brunswick

Today, I woke up to find our Christmas tree knocked over, unwrapped presents scattered everywhere, and my mom passed out on the sofa with a bottle of booze. Merry Christmas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 196

You deserved it 2 782

By Anonymous - 17/07/2015 22:24 - Canada - Sackville

Today, my crazy drug-addict mother kicked me out of the house after siding with my crazy, drug-addict aunt, who'd just threatened to slit my throat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 078

You deserved it 2 009

mamamiaaa_fml 12

Monday 30 January 2012 11:55

Call the popo on the nanny for child endangerment who cares about the mother-in-law in a situation like this?

itsmygoodlife 4

Monday 30 January 2012 11:54

Wow. Great nanny.

Comments

Clamcreepy 7

Monday 30 January 2012 12:18

Well there goes that bitch bonus

BlanketHogger 0

Monday 30 January 2012 12:26

Someone's not getting a promotion...

ellakacyme22 6

Monday 30 January 2012 12:33

Make sure the child is ok then call the police to come wake up nanny and stop fussing about the MIL

bizarre_ftw 21

Wednesday 1 February 2012 5:10

Why wake up the nanny? Stick her in a squad car, then a cell, and let her wake up and freak out

rhyleigh 1

Monday 30 January 2012 12:39

Mil is the least of your problems.

Schiffy 18

Monday 30 January 2012 12:41

follow these steps: 1. Check to make sure the kid's OK. 2. Clean. 3. Wake up the nanny. 4. Fire the nanny. 5. Fire your mother-in-law. (If only that last one were possible)