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By Cinnanyan / Thursday 2 June 2016 10:20 / Philippines - Quezon City
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By  Baustigt  |  40

Sure it begins with the styrofoam apples. Innocent enough. But then the craving sets in. And soon before you know it you're eating the coasters, and then the insulation from the ceiling, and then the ceiling. And your roommates will say "There goes Susan, who ate us out of house and home." And they'll sit in their three-legged chairs in the sad empty lot where their house used to be and wonder where it all went wrong. But you'll know. And a single tear will slip down your cheek as you remember that dreaded first apple and suck the last of the batting from the walls.

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By  Cinnanyan  |  9

Hello! It is I, the OP. Honestly, I don't even care that I was an absent-minded idiot. I'm just so happy my FML got posted. Next time I'll be sure to check first if it's a real apple before biting into it!

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As someone who is prone to falling, bumping into things, forgetting to open my mouth when I'm drying to drink and other embarrassing things, I have some advice. Just be the first to laugh at yourself. Be self deprecating and people will not make fun of you! A friend actually told me how well I handled those kind of things recently. So really trust me when I say you don't have to pretend nothing happened. Laugh and everything will be fine!

By  Baustigt  |  40

Sure it begins with the styrofoam apples. Innocent enough. But then the craving sets in. And soon before you know it you're eating the coasters, and then the insulation from the ceiling, and then the ceiling. And your roommates will say "There goes Susan, who ate us out of house and home." And they'll sit in their three-legged chairs in the sad empty lot where their house used to be and wonder where it all went wrong. But you'll know. And a single tear will slip down your cheek as you remember that dreaded first apple and suck the last of the batting from the walls.

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