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I know you're being funny. But people that have kids aren't going to find this funny :/ You should know how the FML community is by now lol.

I was a projectile vomiter as a kid. I was the kid who puked on your everything. I mean your life sucks, but I sympathize for the kid.

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Um. Idk. some rugs are really, really expensive. However, idk if I'd have expensive things that kids have access to ruin.

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