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Don't hummingbirds have short lifespans? I think it would be a lot less effort if you just let it die, and maybe become friends with it and exchange pleasantries while it was still alive. Maybe play a few board games, eat ice cream together, ride a two-person bike. Then, once he's riding the bike, ditch him, go back to your house and lock all of the doors and windows. This is me rambling.

By  KaySL

Oh, I wholeheartedly agree with your second point, despite the incredible length and often hyperbolic statements you made. The essay you included on the relative merits of getting your testicles chromed and chiselled also struck a chord with me, as well as a great many other people I'm sure. I hope to read more such excellent dissertations from you in the future. I salute you, sir.

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good job not closing the door. u could invite a friend over n pull a Chris farley/David spade. black sheep anyone?

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how do you expect him to shut the door while carrying a bird? It'd be kinda difficult and what if he had no keys? FYL op

Don't hummingbirds have short lifespans? I think it would be a lot less effort if you just let it die, and maybe become friends with it and exchange pleasantries while it was still alive. Maybe play a few board games, eat ice cream together, ride a two-person bike. Then, once he's riding the bike, ditch him, go back to your house and lock all of the doors and windows. This is me rambling.

Two and a half hours? You were definitely set on getting that bird out of your house. After thirty minutes I would've gotten fed up and opened all the doors and windows to let it find its own way out.

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Kay, I just got off the line with Warner Brothers' lawyers, and they would like $1,000,000 for the uncredited Pepé Le Pew reference. You can make the check out to "Doctor Bastard, MD." Thanks.

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You know what, I'm just going shoot myself dead instead. Sit back and watch the thumbs go up on this comment :D

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What can I say, I guess I have my fans after all. Or maybe just a bunch of people who want to see me suffer. Yes, yesss...

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Doubtless, and it doesn't bother me in the least to be quite honest, and no I don't mean that in the 15-year-old "look at me look at me look at me I don't care what you think of me loololololol" sense, either. People take my comments seriously? Boohoohoo. They surely need to lighten up.

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That's weird I could if sworn I saw someone thinking I'm a female. Anyways what's wrong with me being 16? I'm prob taller than you, but boy am I glad I don't know you irl :) Or live anywhere where I am from.

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Oh, I wholeheartedly agree with your second point, despite the incredible length and often hyperbolic statements you made. The essay you included on the relative merits of getting your testicles chromed and chiselled also struck a chord with me, as well as a great many other people I'm sure. I hope to read more such excellent dissertations from you in the future. I salute you, sir.

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*clears throat and begins to make a profound statement of great length with no sarcasm* That was the greatest comment I have ever read.

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Would a sticker of a golden star make you feel "Special"? *Gives sticker and pats you head* Make more comments like that and you will be rewarded with more stars!

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Oh yes! First time my comment got moderated. Are there any achievements to earn on FML? Cause would like to earn the "First time comment moderated" award. Thanks. I would like it as a bade beside my picture.

This worked for me: Open up an umbrella. Get it under the umbrella. Take the umbrella outside. Release bird.

leave it for abit.. try again later.. in the meantime you should name it? i have some suggestions: Muriel Gertrude gladice agatha cornelious beautrice Mildred prudence Winifred.

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