By Anonymous - 27/11/2009 21:24 - United Kingdom

Today, a doctor examined my wrist, which is completely swollen and painful. He diagnosed a case of tendonitis and asked me, "Do you use this hand for a particular sort of sport?" I just smiled like a twit. FML
I agree, your life sucks 10 964
You deserved it 48 585

Same thing different taste

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Yeah, time to switch hands or get a toy :)

trying to beat my personal best right now

This guy in my school told me he's masturbated 17 times in one day. 17 times! How do you do that?! Geesh!

alwaysalady 0

That shocks me. how can they mastrurbate 17 times in a day but only keep at it with a woman for 15 minutes before it's spent?

Towelie_31 0

i don't think i'd want to jackoff 17 times in one day. if you keep going after the 15th time you're just trying to be a showoff

Well most younger guys can do it every half an hour. Apparently it's supposed to make you really deppressed though.

A friend of mine has a record of 21 times in one day. His right arm, especially the forearm, is huge, and a lot bigger than his left one.

Uh, no, actually, masturbation/sexual release is actually reccommended for alleviating depression. Try again.

Ooooohhh... So is that why my chronic depression has been seeming to go away? ;D

dr_octagonapus47 4

Bc he took horny goat weed and had no lady to use it on

perdix 29

So, which version do you play? The one where you go for accuracy or distance?

CyclonePsycho 1

Don't forget freestyle. OP: Dear grass that's funny. xD

perdix 29

Thanks for reminding me. One of the worst jobs out there. 1) Commercial fisherman 2) Crack ***** 3) Monkey-spanking Judge: Freestyle.

oh god... i dont think ive ever heard anyone under sixty actually say "twit"...

I assume you're not English then. It's quite common there, which is where the OP hails from. I prefer "twat" myself though, as it packs more of a punch.

I'm 14 and I'd say "twit." It just doesn't cut it as compared to "twat" or "nitwit" though.

Skullcrusher 5

Ahh! An admitted monkeyspanker!

LMAO!!! wow, thats disgusting but hilarious at the same time. ur doc must be creeped out

CyclonePsycho 1

Eh, doubt it. He probably gets this all the time.

Ge out and go find a girl. u did it 2 often, u must b doin that 3 times a day and 3 hrs a time

snapdragon1100 7

You need to learn how to type.