Here Are This Week's Top 10 Funniest Comments
10. Great location, great school system, old man pooping on the toilet...
“he costs extra, but you can rent him, too.”
9. This is why family reunions are always awkward.
“Hopefully you replied "neither is self defense!" before kicking him in the balls so hard, they popped.”
8. Good parenting 101.
“They wanted to try out your bong to make sure it was of sufficient quality for their son. Parenting requires sacrifices like that!”
7. The results are in: you ARE the father!
Today, we got the results of our family's ancestry DNA tests. My father isn't related to me, but my grandfather is still my grandfather. Apparently grandma cheated on grandpa to get 'dad', and my mother cheated on 'dad' with my 'uncle' to get me. FML
“I feel like in OP's situation, the DNA test stands for "Do Not Ask!"”
6. When fitness is life.
“That's why you don't skip leg day bro”
5. Nothing but respect for MY wax lady.
“He’s right, Donald Trump does look like a cunt..,”
“911 I like to report a murder”
4. And even more hilarious political puns...
“She took him out with her weapon of mASS destruction.”
3. They mean business.
“Damn, those realtors are taking house staging to the next level.”
“You really shit the bed on this one.”
1. Annnnd another one for this FML because the comments were fire, much like this guys ass.
“You’d think “diarrhea” would work as a universally accepted safe word, even without being pre-arranged.”
META COMMENT BONUS ROUND
“Time to let the diarrhea fly and change the subject!”
Today, I found out that my boyfriend of 7 years has been communicating extensively with his ex, who lives out of state, for over 6 months. She booked flights and a hotel nearby in a month and invited him. He didn't say no. FML
“Time to hack his butt plug”