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Christmas is nearly here, it's time for Secret Santa to give out gifts to people you really hate (and/or your mother-in-law)

By Alan / mercredi 20 décembre 2017 05:30
With online shops like Amazon, life is a whole lot easier with regards to Xmas shopping. To avoid the braying crowd who would knife you to get hold of that last Barbie doll, here's a selection of horrible stuff you can buy for that annoying person in your life.

A special Christmas FML list for everyone!

We've selected 15 articles that you can buy on Amazon directly, and send it to the person you want to give the amazing gift to. We'll let you decide who deserves it! 

You just have to click on the Amazon link next to each article to order !

 

1 - The best of David Hasslehoff. Amazing album. Period. (Amazon, $11,99E)

 

 

2 - Who better to ask cooking advice that Coolio? Exactly (Amazon, $9,18)

 

3 - For the snorer you despise (Amazon, $9,99)

 

4 - Know someone who smells of cat urine 24/7? Get them dancing! (Amazon, $10,71)

 

 

5 - When memes meet posters. Oh, the humanity… (Amazon, $8,97)

 

6 - A fragrance for that asshole you know. (Amazon, $9,25)

 

 

7 - Does your miserable old aunt enjoy tea? Here, get her this. Or these. (Amazon, $14,95)

 

 

8 - Get the message across with soap. (Amazon, $11)

9 - The pet lover that gets on your tits will hate you for this. (Amazon, $7,99)

10 - Not exactly the most recent Isis, but let's reclaim the name with a bad TV show (Amazon, $112,60)

 

 

11 - Oh, how cheeky! (Amazon, $9,95)

 

 

12 - Everyone loves a good coloring book! (Amazon, $9,95)

 

 

13 - Get someone this to stick on the back of their car, everyone will love them! (Amazon, $9,99)

 

 

14 - We all do it! (Amazon, $9,99)

 

15 - This is so charming, it'll displease almost anyone!(Amazon, $7,89E)

16 - Get it for that person who doesn't read science papers and doesn't know that you're more likely to get cancer from bacon than glyphosate (Amazon, $18,76)

17- What a lovely doll for your nephew! (Amazon, $52,49E)

  

18 - Emergency underpants for that person who's always pissing you off! (Amazon, $5,66E

19 - Got vegans in your family or friends? Get them this! (Amazon, $11,99)

 

20 - Are your friends rednecks? Here's the perfect gift! (Amazon, $11,29)

 

21- Here are some dumb socks, perfect! (Amazon, from $7,88)

22 - These aren't bullets, it's an USB stick with a keychain. NRA bait. (Amazon, $9,98)

23 - Who has bad breath? Get them one of these! (Amazon, $19,99E)

24 - A 6ft extension lead for headphones. Why? Because fuck you, that's why. (Amazon, $4,35)

 

25 - Your brother in law loves his truck? He hates saunas? Tough. (Amazon, $7,98E)

  

Go on, admit it, you want one of these gifts for yourself.

Tell us in the comments the most FML present you've ever received

Merry Christmas!

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Top comments
By  arioch_fml  |  18

Haven't gotten anything really that bad, but this year I'm wrapping my presents in brown paper ( meat packaging), duct tape( small strips to make it harder to open), Saran wrap, and a couple hundred zip ties. lol

Comments
Reply
  JINXnocturnal  |  18

The part on the right goes on the back of the head, the left is the chin. It's supposed to work by aligning your jaw so you don't snore, but the mouth guards are just as effective.

By  arioch_fml  |  18

Haven't gotten anything really that bad, but this year I'm wrapping my presents in brown paper ( meat packaging), duct tape( small strips to make it harder to open), Saran wrap, and a couple hundred zip ties. lol

Reply
  Yudith  |  16

That's mean. Forget the zip ties and do what I do; wrap my presents like matriochkas; paper, box, tape, paper, box, tape, paper, box, tape, etc. each box coming right from the recycle bin. Finish with paper, a bit of tape and one mile of thin ribbon.

Reply
  arioch_fml  |  18

The whole purpose of me wrapping like that is to be mean. lol, the only ones not getting like that are my grandparents and my 4 year old nephew because it would be too hard for them to open.

By  Callyn  |  44

Alan, you're not even trying. Awesome socks and USB keychains are low-tier trolls. I got my friend the paperback of 'Helicopter Man Pounds Dinosaur Billionaire Ass (A Novel)' by handsome author name of Chuck Tingle for his birthday, much better than most of these.

By  boopingsnoot  |  23

I like to multi-wrap gifts for my sister. One year I got her Amnesia: The Dark Descent and wrapped it, put it in a gift bag, put the bag in a box, and wrapped the box. Priceless.

By  Glowworm56  |  25

My boyfriend once gave me a pair of squirrel underwear. Yeah, you read that correctly. It's a tiny pair of underwear to put on a squirrel who has the nerve to walk around with his acorns showing in public. No, I never was brave or stupid or drunk enough to try to attempt to clothe one with them.

By  KittyMack  |  10

One of my worst gifts was the year a SIL gave everyone red socks. I guess she felt that color choice made them christmassy but it put us all at risk of that dreaded laundry mishap, pink whites.

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