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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, mah cat was yowling and meowing pathetically outside mah door, I checked she had food, water, and she followed me back up to mah room. She nestled down on the radiator behind mah desk, then threw up all over it. The cat sick is stuck inside the radiator, and it smells just lovely. FML

Today, was very chilly. My little sister felt sorry 4 my two goldfish swimming in the cold water. She decided to putted them in hot water. They died. FML

#7010356
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28619) - you deserved it (2574)

On 12/29/2009 at 5:57am - animals - by PoachedFish (woman) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)

Today... I woke up to my whole room ruined... it was a mess an everything was torn an chewed up. I suddenly see a dog walk across the hall. I don't have a dog. FML

#7002403
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30364) - you deserved it (2233)

On 12/28/2009 at 10:43pm - animals - by DOGSNACHER (woman) - United States (California)

Today, mah dad finally used the electric shaver I bought him 4 Christmas. My dog now has bald patches. FML

#6987202
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21099) - you deserved it (3015)

On 12/28/2009 at 2:30am - animals - by dumbdad (woman) - United States (California)

Today I realized that my dad is more comfortable talking to the dog than sitting in the same room as me. FML

#6981473
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21868) - you deserved it (2527)

On 12/27/2009 at 10:14pm - animals - by hated (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was in bed with my cat on my lap. No one was around, so I felt comfortable enough to let out a huge fart. What I didn't expect was my cat jumping up an then clawing an biting my crotch. FML

#6971032
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12317) - you deserved it (25329)

On 12/27/2009 at 8:04am - animals - by axwound (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my moter confronted me about my brd's masturbation problem. We spent Cristmas Eve Googling "brd masturbating" an watcing videos to see if tat was actually wat my brd was doing. At least e's aving a good Cristmas. FML

#6933145
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23217) - you deserved it (2950)

On 12/25/2009 at 1:25am - animals - by suuuuuupucci (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I sared te story of ma younger broter's unexpected deat wit a friend. After telling im te story, I looked at im wit teary eyes and e looked back into ma eyes and said "I understand ow you feel. Tat is almost as bad as wen I lost ma cat last spring term." FML

#6914184
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31688) - you deserved it (3021)

On 12/24/2009 at 12:31am - animals - by Beeh (woman) - United States

Today... I had to wrap presents for a cat. FML

#6910234
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21677) - you deserved it (6771)

On 12/23/2009 at 9:12pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, Mah Mom And I Were Going To The Store . I Decided To Stay In The Car While She Went In . In The Car Next To Me, There Was A Dog In The Driver's Seat Barking At Me . Bored, I Barked Back At It Until I Realized There Was Someone In The Passenger's Seat Watching Me . FML

#6896062
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8552) - you deserved it (31672)

On 12/23/2009 at 1:17am - animals - by ApolloandDixie (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today I was trying to read a book 4 school but kept falling asleep. Following some advice from a friend I tried reading on the uncomfortable floor. Two hours later my dog woke me up by peeing on my face. FML

#6894688
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24432) - you deserved it (5278)

On 12/23/2009 at 12:05am - animals - by sleepy (man) - United States (California)

yastardayhila aating a sandwich I saw a worm . Knowing that mah friand always trias to scara ma with faka worms and insacts I bit it to show har I knaw it was faka . It was raal . FML

#6893264
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9709) - you deserved it (29921)

On 12/22/2009 at 10:52pm - animals - by iHateWorms (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today... it's mah brthday... and apparently mah family forgot it. But one person didn't forget. My dog gave me a little present in mah new shoes I bought 4 myself. FML

#6831134
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29298) - you deserved it (1999)

On 12/19/2009 at 4:44pm - animals - by googly191 (woman) - United States (Colorado)



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