Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Today, I took my cat to the vet. He said he felt a strange lump that could be serious. I got really upset and picked her up, crying. The vet then told me I had to put her down. Absolutely devastated by having to euthanize my cat, I passed out. He meant I had to put her back on the table. FML

#7932396
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25170) - you deserved it (12901)

On 02/06/2010 at 10:19am - animals - by sadcat (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I found out that my girlfriend feeds her boogers to our dog. Sometimes she even makes her do tricks for them. FML

#7925125
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30600) - you deserved it (3046)

On 02/06/2010 at 1:27am - animals - by btg - United States (California)

Today, my dog accidentally crapped on her leash. When I flicked the leash to get the poo off, it went flying. Have you ever had warm poo hit you in the face on a cold day when there's 6 inches of snow on the ground? I have. FML

#7913686
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22648) - you deserved it (8577)

On 02/05/2010 at 7:50pm - animals - by doggie_doo_face (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, after calling my boyfriend and telling him that my dog had just died, he hesitated and stuttered "She was old, sick, and suffering. Babe, it was her time to go." He then informed me he had to go to his friend's house and hung up. My dog was 2, in great health, and was hit by a car. FML

#7835158
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29306) - you deserved it (2518)

On 02/03/2010 at 12:03am - animals - by Brittany (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I put out a fire. Sadly, it was on my doorstep because someone had lit a bag of dog poop. FML

#7813334
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24644) - you deserved it (3843)

On 02/02/2010 at 12:32pm - animals - by anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was walking by a pond when I saw a small frog. I decided to catch it to get a close look. After I picked it up, I realized that it was not a frog. It was dog shit shaped like a frog. FML

#7776158
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11724) - you deserved it (33958)

On 02/01/2010 at 9:34am - animals - by adad - Sent from mobile version

Today, I heard the sound of footsteps in the basement. Thinking it was burglars I grabbed a baseball bat and hurried down the stairs. I then tripped on the stairs, fell down them and smacked my head on the bat. The sound of footsteps I heard? It was my cat playing in some cardboard boxes. FML

#7775610
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21502) - you deserved it (6410)

On 02/01/2010 at 8:45am - animals - by dontbadouche - Senegal

Today, I was taking my dogs for a walk, then it started to rain, and the wind went mad. I ran for cover in the trees near a bridge, slipped and fell into a river. I was soaking wet and my boots were full of water. Then to get back out of the river, I had to use stinging nettles as hand holds. FML

#7767397
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23489) - you deserved it (3124)

On 02/01/2010 at 12:27am - animals - by Jammy238 - Sent from mobile version

Today, after a 9 hour train journey through the Polish mountains, I mistook a small black and white cat for a penguin. FML

#7753141
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6252) - you deserved it (23278)

On 01/31/2010 at 7:21pm - animals - by saintmichi (woman) - Poland (Malopolskie)

Today, I went to get my friend a drink while she sat in the lounge watching TV with my dog. When I came back, I found her licking my dogs ears. She said he dared her to do it. FML

#7540376
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26178) - you deserved it (2972)

On 01/24/2010 at 7:28am - animals - by CheeseMonsters (woman) - United Kingdom (Reading)

Today, while grooming my horse, a spider crawled onto my ear. As if that was bad enough, I'm extremely arachnophobic, so I shrieked out of habit, which in turn caused my horse to freak out and kick me. FML

Today, I found out that when you hit the neighbor's dog with your car, they might chase you a mile with a shotgun. FML

#7493759
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9427) - you deserved it (38074)

On 01/22/2010 at 3:14am - animals - by S.Bunny (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I spent 3 hours in my home recording studio. I was recording vocals and was trying to hit a very hard series of notes. I nailed it after 2 hours and listened. You can hear the vocals, but the EQ settings were tweaked in just the right way where you can hear my dog licking his nuts. FML

#7490681
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23368) - you deserved it (4910)

On 01/22/2010 at 12:08am - animals - by Parental (man) - United States (Wisconsin)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: