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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, my dog is mad at me due to the fact that earlier in the day I ate 2 peanut butter cookies. Apparently, they were his dog treats. I had no idea. FML

#11624830
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9691) - you deserved it (31704)

On 07/03/2010 at 12:04am - animals - by peanuts (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out what cat food tastes like mixed with mayo, hot sauce, and between two perfectly toasted pieces of rye bread. My cat found out what tuna tastes like instead of her normal food. FML

#11310878
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10746) - you deserved it (31615)

On 06/19/2010 at 12:27pm - animals - by kasai_x0x (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I was taking my dog on a walk when two younger looking boys rode their bikes up towards me. One said, "What about her?" The other boy said, "Nah, she's ugly." FML

#11271571
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28551) - you deserved it (3157)

On 06/17/2010 at 6:56pm - animals - by MCRxforever - United States (Missouri)

Today, it was a little colder than it should be for this time of year, and as a result I was using the heater in my car. Apparently within the last four months, a mouse managed to make his way into my heater vent and die. I can not get the smell of death out of my car. FML

#11164761
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32179) - you deserved it (2875)

On 06/13/2010 at 5:56am - animals - by spenmy - United States (Colorado)

Today, my husband decided he will be a 'stay at home' dad. We have two cats. No kids. FML

#10938544
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31587) - you deserved it (3628)

On 06/03/2010 at 3:44am - animals - by Kate - United States (Arizona)

Today, I found that my cats somehow managed to pull the plug of my fridge out of the socket. Several days ago. Now I have to get rid of a ton of stinking food and clean the stinking fridge. FML

#10863158
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22539) - you deserved it (6522)

On 05/30/2010 at 12:53pm - animals - by Alexander (man) - Russian Federation (Saint Petersburg City)

Today, a four pound can of tuna fell on my head at work, and it burst all over my clothes. Since I'm the manager, I had to stay all day reeking of tuna. Now I'm home, my damn cat won't leave me alone. FML

#10855287
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28030) - you deserved it (3908)

On 05/30/2010 at 1:12am - animals - by Alpheas - United States (Texas)

Today, I was spelling T-R-E-A-T to my fiancé so that the dog wouldn't understand what I was talking about. Turns out, neither could my fiancé. FML

#10853555
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27305) - you deserved it (4911)

On 05/30/2010 at 12:01am - animals - by misTreated (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I couldn't sleep because I had the worst time positioning myself around my cat who was sleeping in my bed. I couldn't kick my cat out of bed because I earlier today had an argument with my brother over which of us the cat loved more. FML

#10813076
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7875) - you deserved it (37642)

On 05/28/2010 at 12:30am - animals - by Teresa (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, while getting ready for a friend's wedding, I was curling my eyelashes. My cat decided to jump onto the towel rod. As I went to catch her, I ripped all the eyelashes out of one eye. I called my boyfriend crying. When he saw me, he laughed and said, "You look really surprised in that eye." FML

#10693899
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29645) - you deserved it (6837)

On 05/22/2010 at 4:32pm - animals - by lashless (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I swerved to avoid running over a dead cat in the road. Instead, I ran over its head. The crack of its skull was loud enough for me to hear it. FML

#10668547
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36699) - you deserved it (7679)

On 05/21/2010 at 1:26pm - animals - by anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I let my dog outside so he could pee. After an hour, I let him back in. He just wanted to come inside to pee on the floor. FML

#10629678
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26033) - you deserved it (4096)

On 05/19/2010 at 4:43pm - animals - by Rich - United States (New York)

Today, my friends and I had a long fun day at the river. That was until sundown. I now have mosquito bites in places you don't want to know. FML

#10511557
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19132) - you deserved it (10065)

On 05/13/2010 at 6:49pm - animals - by Alicia - United States (California)



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