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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, my 5 year old fish died. As I was flushing him, he started swimming again. FML

#17371338
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41540) - you deserved it (7584)

On 08/04/2011 at 9:47pm - animals - by dukebluedevils13 - United States (Colorado)

Today, my pet fish died because my drunk father microwaved it. FML

#17362826
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44423) - you deserved it (2990)

On 08/04/2011 at 1:44am - animals - by SydIsPrettyCool - United States (Michigan)

Today, my cat died in the process of eating, and choking on, my hamster. FML

#17359587
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41892) - you deserved it (4031)

On 08/03/2011 at 9:19pm - animals - by roze198765 - United States

Today, I decided to play with my dog. I sat on the ground and whistled for him to come to me. I smiled when I saw him running at my happily. He sniffed me, turned around, lifted his leg and peed on me. FML

#17343675
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27651) - you deserved it (4986)

On 08/02/2011 at 1:35pm - animals - by Username - United States

Today, the crazy cat lady who lives next to me lost one of her cats. She sat outside with a whistle at 6:00 this morning and continued to blow her whistle for hours. FML

#17327008
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27470) - you deserved it (2433)

On 08/01/2011 at 12:41am - animals - by Username - United States

Today, my 17 pound cat fell from a counter. It wouldn't have been a big deal if he didn't try to use my leg as a tree to cling onto on the way down. FML

#17312573
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28922) - you deserved it (4617)

On 07/30/2011 at 7:58pm - animals - by Backinzi - United States (Iowa)

Today, in health class, I raised my hand and asked if you could get an STD from dogs. I have officially now ruined any extremely small chance I had of being popular. FML

#17304355
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10935) - you deserved it (74512)

On 07/30/2011 at 12:38am - animals - by loser4life - United States (Colorado)

Today, I realized that since I started working full time, the only friend I have left is my cat. Lonely and bored out of my mind, I told him about my day. He decided to end the conversation by shitting on the floor. FML

#17298828
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31607) - you deserved it (5958)

On 07/29/2011 at 3:17pm - animals - by Username - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my husband threw out all of the spices in the cupboard. When I asked him why he said, "Our cat was named Spicy and I can't stand to look at them." Our recently deceased cat's name was Dicey. FML

#17283376
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31178) - you deserved it (3042)

On 07/28/2011 at 2:18am - animals - by Tali (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was walking my dog, and a whole bunch of teenagers were driving around my neighborhood throwing water balloons at people. They followed me for 3 blocks. FML

#17277458
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26478) - you deserved it (2426)

On 07/27/2011 at 4:09am - animals - by CarrieRedburn (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I saved a bird from being run over as it lay in the middle of the road. Thinking it had a broken wing or something, I started carrying it home, intending to take it to the vet later. It crapped in my hand and flew away. FML

#17177469
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27964) - you deserved it (8515)

On 07/19/2011 at 1:45pm - animals - by craphanded - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)

Today, it's my birthday. I came downstairs to a cake that said "Happy 8th Birthday Bella!" My name is Sarah and I'm 16. Bella is our dog whose birthday is next month. FML

#17163751
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34647) - you deserved it (2540)

On 07/18/2011 at 2:05pm - animals - by unbirthday (woman) - United States

Today, I was riding my bike and swerved to avoid hitting a lizard. I ended up sliding into a bush and skinning myself, only to find my tires had still managed to cut the lizard to pieces. FML

#17151333
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26527) - you deserved it (8185)

On 07/17/2011 at 4:44pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)



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