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Today, I was in my car with my window down at a red light. Outside, a sweet old lady was sitting on a bench with her dog sleeping next to her. I yelled out the window to tell her how cute her dog was. She replied, "He's dead" and cried. FML

#17639709
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32935) - you deserved it (4308)

On 09/01/2011 at 10:29pm - animals - by macattack (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I tried to impress the guy I like. He breeds reptiles, and I happen to have a snake and a lizard. I went over to his house to show them off. He opened the door just as my lizard fell between my boobs. He had to help me get it out. FML

#17621188
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23053) - you deserved it (11896)

On 08/30/2011 at 1:35pm - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mother-in-law told my husband that I cannot stay in her house unless I can bring proof from a doctor that my allergy to cats is not contagious. FML

#17612876
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27770) - you deserved it (2205)

On 08/29/2011 at 2:47pm - animals - by anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I bought a new goldfish. While leaving my fish on my balcony to go get fish food, I hear a loud squawk and splash, I race outside to see a bird flying off with my fish. FML

#17603044
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14320) - you deserved it (38874)

On 08/28/2011 at 7:29am - animals - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I excitedly showed my new roommate my pet fish. She then told me about how she purposely starved her last fish to see how long it would take before they started eating each other before starving to death. FML

#17597730
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29153) - you deserved it (2607)

On 08/27/2011 at 6:59pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I got into a heated argument with my mom, because apparently I'm an idiot for not sharing her belief that chickens are mammals. She has a university degree in this stuff. FML

#17586338
287 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27725) - you deserved it (3376)

On 08/26/2011 at 2:29pm - animals - by James - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, I had to take my dog to the vet for him to be put to sleep. I could feel the cold, hard shaft of irony slide its way up my ass and slowly fuck me senseless with every step I took on this beautiful National Dog Day. FML

#17586114
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31691) - you deserved it (5460)

On 08/26/2011 at 1:49pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I watched my neighbor bring his dogs into my yard to let them empty their piss-pipes and poop-chutes. He does this twice a day. I put a "cut it out" sign up. His dogs peed on the sign and knocked it down. My lawn is a landmine of dog logs and I don't know what to do, besides installing actual landmines. FML

Today, I bought a Halloween costume for my cat. FML

#17544670
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8691) - you deserved it (37588)

On 08/22/2011 at 2:04am - animals - by vishuzzbabe77 - United States

Today, my beloved pet chicken ran away from home. I got so distraught that my dad offered to buy me dinner. Specifically, KFC. FML

#17538600
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30022) - you deserved it (5766)

On 08/21/2011 at 2:23pm - animals - by xXangelaXx - United States

Today, over a year on from my parents telling me my dog had died, I went to the shelter to volunteer, and saw my old dog. FML

#17534903
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45985) - you deserved it (2204)

On 08/21/2011 at 1:51am - animals - by Dogless - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I thought I might need some anger-management classes, after I punched a hole in a kitchen cabinet when my dog wouldn't stop yapping every time the rooster my neighbors just got made a noise. FML

#17518682
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10114) - you deserved it (24829)

On 08/19/2011 at 11:08am - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I bought my cats two new litter boxes in hopes that they would use them. They still prefer to pee on the clothes in my closet. FML

#17509957
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22586) - you deserved it (6674)

On 08/18/2011 at 1:40pm - animals - by princessbbee - United States



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