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Today, my blind date turned out to be my gynecologist. FML

#21229613
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47679) - you deserved it (3706)

On 08/04/2014 at 10:00pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

purpleturtle16's comment : Who says you can't date your gynecologist?!

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Today, I found out the hard way that no good girlfriend-boyfriend conversation ever started with, "Suppose I slept with your best friend..." FML

#21229506
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39913) - you deserved it (8291)

On 08/04/2014 at 7:04pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

quinniet's comment : "Suppose I dumped your ass"

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Today, I posted an ad online for house cleaning services. So far, all fifteen responses have been solicitations for sex. FML

#21229459
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34238) - you deserved it (3895)

On 08/04/2014 at 5:54pm - work - by notthenaughtymaid (woman) - United States (Virginia)

kangx1's comment : Wow those people are so DIRTY :)

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Today, I asked my mom about signing up for an online dating site. She took one look at me and said, "Why get rejected online when you can just go outside for the same?" FML

#21229228
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37523) - you deserved it (3805)

On 08/04/2014 at 11:08am - misc - by baebookboo - United States (Kansas)

Today, due to a hammer-related incident, instead of receiving glass ornaments as gifts from my trip to Venice, my friends will be receiving novelty postcards of Michelangelo's David's penis. FML

Today, while talking to my sister, I explained to her that the reason I hope I end up having a girl is I want my daughter to love me the way I "used" to love my own mother. I didn't mean to say it in the past tense. My sister told my mom. She's planning my baby shower. FML

#21229187
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33737) - you deserved it (5960)

On 08/04/2014 at 9:20am - love - by mother to be - United States

Today, my husband was disgusted by me expressing breast milk while we were in the shower together. This is the same man who thinks it's funny to pee on my legs because, "It'll wash off." FML

#21229021
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42538) - you deserved it (4185)

On 08/04/2014 at 1:42am - health - by Ew?Really? (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my elderly mother explained that, "I don't need my glasses to drive, I just need them to see." FML

#21228755
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35131) - you deserved it (2504)

On 08/03/2014 at 8:47pm - misc - by scared - Canada

Today, my neighbour casually mentioned that he sold my car's GPS that I'd let him borrow. He figured I wouldn't be needing it anymore since I lost my license. FML

#21228738
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37142) - you deserved it (4887)

On 08/03/2014 at 8:19pm - money - by lovethyneighbour - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was taking an order for a patron at the casino. The policy is to "pay first." After explaining this to him, he still refused to pay. After years of being polite, I finally cracked and said, "You are making this really f-ing difficult". This particular patron was our CEO's son. FML

#21228632
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37518) - you deserved it (12114)

On 08/03/2014 at 6:02pm - work - by really though? - United States (Delaware)

Today, I painted my nails in the car. After I finished, I stuck my hands out the window to let them dry. When I pulled my hands back in there were live bugs stuck in my nail polish. FML

#21228488
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23323) - you deserved it (45081)

On 08/03/2014 at 2:49pm - misc - by ew - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to give a video presentation. My video was on animal abuse, but I somehow played a video of myself singing Britney Spears in my room. FML

Today, while I was waiting for the train, a woman sat next to me. Her dog jumped up between us and I started petting it. She took this to mean we were now close enough for her to tell me in detail about her experience so far going through the menopause. FML

#21228437
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35357) - you deserved it (3733)

On 08/03/2014 at 1:36pm - misc - by Anonymous - Sweden (Skane Lan)



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