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Man or woman?

Today, I remember the first night I spent with my first English boyfriend. I'm French, and when we woke up, I said in my most sexy voice "Oh, I'm so dirty!" It's only when he left that I finally understood the look on his face; I wanted to have a glass of water. I was thirsty, not dirty. FML

#286
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28128) - you deserved it (6910)

On 11/12/2008 at 3:10am - intimacy - by aur - Sent from mobile version

Today, I dropped my keys in the sewer. The spare ones are inside my locked car. FML

#754
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18290) - you deserved it (7037)

On 11/12/2008 at 3:10am - misc - by - Sent from mobile version

Today, at work, I received an email telling me that viewing porn websites was prohibited and was a good enough reason to fire me. FML

#285
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7079) - you deserved it (57743)

On 11/12/2008 at 2:53am - work - by bipbip - Sent from mobile version

Today, I'm 20 and I'm going bald. FML

#277
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42699) - you deserved it (2954)

On 11/11/2008 at 3:32am - health - by Blazouta - Sent from mobile version

Today, my company is organizing a huge party. I go to work dressed in my best outfit. At the the lunch break my boss says to me 'You really missed out on something yesterday, it was great fun!' FML

#274
20 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24799) - you deserved it (4913)

On 11/11/2008 at 1:53am - work - by SMV - Sent from mobile version

Today, I gave my son a row for losing a very important paper that I need for my work. I've just found it in my right pocket. FML

#267
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6145) - you deserved it (50264)

On 11/10/2008 at 7:06am - kids - by Daddy - Sent from mobile version

Today, to my delight I discover that there is security camera in the storage room at my work. The same room where, two days ago I masturbated. FML

#265
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10776) - you deserved it (64143)

On 11/10/2008 at 4:11am - work - by tadam - Sent from mobile version

Today, my 6-year-old son said to me, "You smell nice daddy." Surprised but flattered, I thanked him. He then added, "I like the smell of cheese!'" FML

#260
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30041) - you deserved it (5422)

On 11/09/2008 at 6:26am - kids - by lamponau - Sent from mobile version

Today, whilst brushing my teeth, I fell asleep poking myself in the eye with my toothbrush. FML

#258
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19799) - you deserved it (11107)

On 11/09/2008 at 4:18am - health - by Noname - Sent from mobile version

Today, my mum was watching a program about sexually transmitted diseases. Later on she starts telling me that I should be careful and use the right protection when having sex. Suddenly she stops and says « Actually I don’t know why I’m telling you this, after all you don’t have a boyfriend! » and walks away. FML

#257
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47696) - you deserved it (4272)

On 11/09/2008 at 2:43am - intimacy - by Enko - Sent from mobile version

Today, everyone thought that I was the one who farted in the lift. FML

#251
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27811) - you deserved it (4465)

On 11/08/2008 at 2:51am - misc - by Kat - Sent from mobile version

Today, for the 25th time, an Indian called my cell phone asking for 'Pinkie'. I don't know who the hell Pinkie is, but I don't appreciate people calling wrong numbers while I'm having it off. FML

#249
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27251) - you deserved it (8635)

On 11/07/2008 at 8:07pm - misc - by Hth - United States (Delaware)



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