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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I got drunk and hooked up with some random chick. Later, I found out she's Facebook friends with my girlfriend. They used to be best friends when the girl was a senior. Small world. FML

#970
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5534) - you deserved it (49069)

On 01/11/2009 at 2:13pm - love - by Noname - United States (Virginia)

Today, I regret that break we took. I thought it would lead him to realize that he wanted to stop cheating and flirting with other girls and be with only me forever. Now I'm the girl he cheats on his girlfriend with. FML

#969
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7061) - you deserved it (32691)

On 01/11/2009 at 1:08pm - love - by Celina - United States (California)

Today, I have a degree in electrical engineering, my wife was doing a crossword and asked me what are the units of capacitance, I couldn't remember. FML

#967
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13575) - you deserved it (7659)

On 01/11/2009 at 11:46am - misc - by jibjab - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went shopping with this girl I like while my girlfriend was busy. We ended up going grocery shopping to make dinner together, and I ran into my girlfriend's parents. FML

#966
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5154) - you deserved it (63852)

On 01/11/2009 at 10:50am - love - by Wreet - United States (California)

Jason's comment : What the hell is up with all the cheaters on here acting trying to act like their lives suck? New flash morons, you are the idiot who chose to cheat, you deserve everything you get.

See all the comments →

Today, my mother told me: "If you didn't exist, I wouldn't stay with your father". So it's MY fault if she's having problems with him? FML

#961
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24883) - you deserved it (1868)

On 01/11/2009 at 10:22am - love - by Yubi - Belgium (Hainaut)

Today, at the age of 22 I started eating my boogers. FML

#962
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5737) - you deserved it (41232)

On 01/11/2009 at 9:33am - misc - by Snotmyfault - United States (Washington)

Today, I found a deodorant spray underneath the counter of the snack place I work in, so give it a try to see what it smells like. It's currently the high season, and so I have quite a few clients standing in line in front of me, but it seems they'll now have to wait a couple of days for the restaurant to have all the remnants of the CS gas spray cleaned up. FML

#956
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5100) - you deserved it (17345)

On 01/11/2009 at 6:14am - work - by Xav_Cad - France (Languedoc-Roussillon)

Today, I lied and said I was late for work because my car's tire was flat. Two hours later, some of my friends came in and said something along the lines that "We should do brunch every saturday, (like this morning) it was awesome!" in front of my manager. FML

#950
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5142) - you deserved it (25466)

On 01/10/2009 at 10:57pm - work - by M to the line - France (Languedoc-Roussillon)

Today, I'm a medicine student, it's my sixth year, and I have spent the whole day in surgery. No one dared tell me that what I was wearing on my feet was actually supposed to be put over my hair. Which was embarrassing. FML

#949
17 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16643) - you deserved it (6619)

On 01/10/2009 at 10:52pm - work - by Carrie - France (Languedoc-Roussillon)

Today, I fell asleep on the train, totally wiped out after last night's party, which involved lots of booze and spicy Indian food. I wake up and notice a small boy staring at me, so I smiled at him. He turned to his father and said, "Daddy, the farting man has just woken up." FML

#947
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19811) - you deserved it (7940)

On 01/10/2009 at 9:11pm - kids - by mark - Sent from mobile version

Today, I got my stuff together before leaving to take the bus: cigarettes, newspaper, mobile phone and the trash. I took me at least 5 minutes in the bus to realize that I was travelling with the trash on my knees. FML

#931
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13577) - you deserved it (5861)

On 01/10/2009 at 9:41am - misc - by titov - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was so bored that I filmed my goldfish while it was eating. FML

#923
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19217) - you deserved it (5231)

On 01/10/2009 at 3:21am - animals - by Crystal - Sent from mobile version

Today, we were out smoking a bit of spliff just walking around. We saw a place to sit down in this little car park we were walking past. The cops came over and busted us. Turns out we were in the main car park for the cop shop. FML

#922
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4702) - you deserved it (36100)

On 01/10/2009 at 1:50am - misc - by karl - Ireland (Dublin)



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