Today, my uncle got me a debit card and put $1000 on it for my Christmas present. However, he forgot to activate the card. The receipt with the 14-digit activation code is in the garbage in Colorado. FML

by kraziikayce / 12/25/2009 at 8:20pm / United States (North Dakota) / Money

Today, I was working at the Soup Kitchen handing out special christmas dinners to the homeless. At the end of the day I collected my things and went home. It was only then I discovered that my wallet, phone, pager and (for some reason) my glasses has been stolen. FML

by calli / 12/25/2009 at 4:21pm / United Kingdom (Oxfordshire) / Work

Today, from my girlfriend of five years, I got my clothes back, my engagment ring and a card that says, "Merry Christmas! It's me not you." FML

by C45 / 12/25/2009 at 3:27pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, my entire extended family was over for Christmas. I opened a gift to see that it was a fruitcake and saw everyone looking at me, smiling. This is their way to tell me that they know I'm gay and that they accept me. I'm straight. FML

by notgay / 12/25/2009 at 2:34pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my parents told me they're getting a divorce. However, they asked me not to tell any of the family so that the news doesn't spoil Christmas. Thanks, Mom and Dad. FML

by parentalfail / 12/25/2009 at 1:19pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I have been stuck in the bathroom. Apparently, my 8 year old son decided to sneak in some TurboLax into the juice we left out for Santa. Well played son. FML

by BathroomMuch / 12/25/2009 at 11:15am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, my 25 year old brother ran into my room very excited at 8am. "Wake up! We got a new puppy!" he told me. I was so excited so I jumped out of my warm bed. When I asked him if he was serious he said "No, but we have to go to church, so get dressed." FML

by MessyMal / 12/25/2009 at 10:30am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out my ex got invited to our Christmas Party. I also found out that she got much more presents and money from my family than I did. FML

by Anonymous / 12/25/2009 at 3:14am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, at work a female co-worker was struggling with a stack of boxes in her hands. Her pantyhose was falling down and she asked me to help her. So I pulled up her pantyhose. When I looked up, she had a horrified look on her face. She was asking me to help her hold the boxes. FML

by harrassment101 / 12/25/2009 at 3:10am / United States (California) / Work

Today, my mom got drunk and decided to unwrap all my Christmas gifts and throw them at the wall. Ho, ho, ho. FML

by sucks_brah / 12/25/2009 at 2:25am / United States (New Mexico) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend. Things got a little hot and I started to pull up my shirt. She screamed and told me to stop because the innocence of her stuffed animals was at stake. We are 18, and she was dead serious. FML

by Anonymous / 12/25/2009 at 2:09am / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend gave me a box of chocolates for Christmas. I thought it was sweet until I noticed the heart drawn on the back. It's the same box of chocolates I gave him for Christmas. Christmas last year. FML

by HeSucks / 12/25/2009 at 2:04am / United States (Mississippi) / Love

Today, I invited my boss and his family over for dinner. As usual, I bought his kids Christmas' presents, nothing too fancy though. This year, he had one more that wasn't here last year. So I just pulled something from under the tree to hand him. He opened it on the spot. It was my son's PS3. FML

by Anonymous / 12/25/2009 at 1:30am / Canada (Ontario) / Work

epccsplayer's comment : YDI. Why would you chance it like that when you knew you had a PS3 under the tree?

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