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Today, I showed my boyfriend a picture of me in what I thought was a sexy skintight dress. He responded by saying "it's ok, I went through a pudgy stage too". The picture was from Saturday night. FML

#6715
20 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24934) - you deserved it (3385)

On 02/03/2009 at 5:38pm - love - by Sam - United States (New York)

Today, when my boyfriend was about to orgasm, I suddenly sneezed all over his face. FML

#6669
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30163) - you deserved it (6811)

On 02/03/2009 at 5:16pm - intimacy - by Zippyzoo (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, the police called because someone had turned in my wallet that was stolen. I happily drove home only to find that my house had been robbed and ransacked. FML

#6627
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39707) - you deserved it (1482)

On 02/03/2009 at 4:46pm - money - by fire0fisis - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I walked in on my porn addicted roommate watching a gynecologist exam online. He asked me to watch it with him. FML

#6607
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39620) - you deserved it (3464)

On 02/03/2009 at 4:38pm - intimacy - by Escape! (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was taking the elevator down with a group of people. It stopped on the 2nd floor and I said "What asshole can't take the steps from the 2nd floor?" Then a kid in a wheelchair got on. FML

#6517
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5448) - you deserved it (41818)

On 02/03/2009 at 3:30pm - misc - by j0natron (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, the only girl I'm friends with deleted my comment off of her profile because she was too embarrassed that people would see we were friends. FML

#6514
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34095) - you deserved it (2801)

On 02/03/2009 at 3:27pm - misc - by sh33zy (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my 4 year old niece asked me why I didn't have a job or wife. FML

#6511
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24782) - you deserved it (6782)

On 02/03/2009 at 3:25pm - misc - by Noname - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I finally got the chance to sleep with a girl from home who I'd wanted for a long time. She has low blood pressure problems though, and when things got hot, she passed out while she was on top of me, fell and hit her head on the night stand. FML

#6481
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41435) - you deserved it (3029)

On 02/03/2009 at 2:58pm - intimacy - by BRELLA (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, after a late night at a bar, I stepped into my building's elevator with a Chinese man who was carrying a plastic bag. Without thinking, I said, "Oooh, are you still delivering?" His response was, "I live here." FML

#6479
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6687) - you deserved it (47339)

On 02/03/2009 at 2:57pm - misc - by Noname - United States (New York)

Today, I was having sex with a guy that I just met, and when I thought he was about to orgasm, he actually had an asthma attack. FML

#6446
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36180) - you deserved it (6680)

On 02/03/2009 at 2:34pm - intimacy - by ally (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I realized it's been 5 days since my boyfriend last answered the phone when I called. Two weeks ago, he told me he used to break up with his girlfriends in a very juvenile way. He doesn't answer their phone calls. FML

#6332
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27678) - you deserved it (2383)

On 02/03/2009 at 12:43pm - love - by Ginger (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my girlfriend's guinea pig managed to go down her shirt. I have been dating her for 3 weeks and I haven't even kissed her yet. FML

#6301
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18220) - you deserved it (38285)

On 02/03/2009 at 12:22pm - intimacy - by Merdoc (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my fiance told me that he no longer loves me, that he still has feelings for an ex. The wedding is off and he needs the ring back to give to the right woman. FML

#6280
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62546) - you deserved it (2635)

On 02/03/2009 at 12:08pm - love - by nolongerengaged (woman) - United States



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