Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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Man or woman?

Today, I played games on Barbie.com and gave up after 10 minutes. They were hard. FML

#14117
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9744) - you deserved it (36507)

On 02/07/2009 at 10:19pm - misc - by lilzoot (man) - United States (Alabama)

circayouandme's comment : Are you kidding me?? Some friends they are. Drop them.

See all the comments →

Today, my friend sent me a link about a nine year old kid who wrote an iPhone app that gets 2000 downloads per week. I am a 28 year old software developer and have been failing to write an iPhone app for months. FML

#14095
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29092) - you deserved it (5335)

On 02/07/2009 at 10:06pm - misc - by dinosaur (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I accidentally unplugged my headphones in the quiet section of the library, causing my music to play from my laptop at full volume. I was listening to Celine Dion. I'm the captain of the football team. FML

#14044
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16650) - you deserved it (45561)

On 02/07/2009 at 9:31pm - misc - by misc - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after leaving a store I got stuck at a red light. A car pulled up next to me and there was a half retarded man jerking his junk at me. Nasty image burned into my corneas forever. FML

#13946
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30409) - you deserved it (3231)

On 02/07/2009 at 8:23pm - misc - by Noname - United States (North Carolina)

Today, the creepy skin care guy at the mall with the heavy accent asked me if I was pregnant. When I said no he replied "Oh, too many donuts then?" FML

#13891
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28564) - you deserved it (6960)

On 02/07/2009 at 7:54pm - misc - by notpreggers (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, the alarm on my phone went off. I picked it up, hit snooze, and dropped it back on my desk without looking. I woke up an hour later to find that I had dropped it directly in a full glass of water. FML

#13889
8 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11590) - you deserved it (22516)

On 02/07/2009 at 7:53pm - misc - by tarheels526 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I thought I was going on a date. About 20 minutes into it, after giving her my arm to hold (like a true gentleman) it came up in conversation that my brother is gay. Her response: "oh, so both you and your brother are gay?" FML

#13786
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33820) - you deserved it (2365)

On 02/07/2009 at 6:33pm - misc - by max (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I tried hallucinogenic mushrooms for the first time with my friend. Little did I know, they last for around 6 hours, and I had class at 3, when I had to give a presentation in front of 30 people. FML

#13772
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8384) - you deserved it (75436)

On 02/07/2009 at 6:24pm - misc - by facepalmshroomer (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I logged onto facebook to realize that my boyfriend is now listed as single. News to me. FML

#13746
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42556) - you deserved it (3074)

On 02/07/2009 at 6:04pm - misc - by klv8 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I sang at a retirement home with my school choir. Afterward we went to speak to the old people, just to get to know them a little. The first woman I shake hands with ask "Are you a boy or a girl?" FML

#13743
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25866) - you deserved it (3665)

On 02/07/2009 at 6:02pm - misc - by ChoirGuy (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was walking down the street with my newly healed implants, when a drag queen approached me and asked who my doctor was, because I was the "most convincing transgender he had ever seen." I'm a woman. FML

#13635
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27359) - you deserved it (9464)

On 02/07/2009 at 4:51pm - misc - by woo. - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went looking for a childhood doll - I remembered that my mum kept her in her bedside cabinet. I could see the doll at the back, but there was stuff in the way, so I reached in and took some of it out, only to find I was holding one of my mum's toys... a big black rubber cock. FML

#13590
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27082) - you deserved it (5901)

On 02/07/2009 at 4:16pm - misc - by J (woman) - United Kingdom (Stockport)



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