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Today, I got this huge package at my college dorm from my parents with candy, chips, canned soup and all these goodies. When I called my mom to thank her, she replied "We got rid of your cat, Annie". FML

#22256
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35530) - you deserved it (2057)

On 02/10/2009 at 8:44pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got on Facebook and realized the only two friend requests I've had in 2 months are both from my parents. FML

#22156
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30775) - you deserved it (4823)

On 02/10/2009 at 8:22pm - misc - by Noname - United States (Tennessee)

Today, someone in class was making a point about premarital intercourse - "90% of teen virgins aren't saving it for marriage, they just can't get any." Another classmate pointed me out specifically. FML

#21964
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37095) - you deserved it (3047)

On 02/10/2009 at 7:41pm - misc - by herpderp (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my mother and I got into a huge fight about me being a lesbian. It ended with me saying "Fuck you!" to which she responded: "I bet you'd probably like to." FML

#21834
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79360) - you deserved it (24648)

On 02/10/2009 at 7:08pm - misc - by peacock_mina19 - United States (Michigan)

Today, while in our communal showers in the highschool football locker room, I started to swing my penis around because it feels good and I was alone. Two minutes later the rest of the team hops into the shower with me. 30 dudes, one self-induced boner. FML

#21808
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10875) - you deserved it (68304)

On 02/10/2009 at 7:01pm - intimacy - by JLoistheBomb (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my sister teased me about being a mistake baby. When I told my mom what my sister said, her response was "I still love you anyway". FML

#21737
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34482) - you deserved it (3165)

On 02/10/2009 at 6:41pm - misc - by melissa (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I made a joke about having a wedding to my mom and she told me not to joke about something that will probably never happen. FML

#21465
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31986) - you deserved it (2954)

On 02/10/2009 at 5:30pm - misc - by NoWedding (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went to get my school picture taken, when the photographer looked at me, saying, "You look like you need a mirror." FML

#21181
13 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24574) - you deserved it (3318)

On 02/10/2009 at 4:15pm - misc - by greattt (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I was on the internet with my Dad looking up information about allergies. I began to type 'allergies' into the Google Search Box and as I typed 'a', the phrase 'amazing sex positions' popped up as a search I had already looked up. My Dad asked me if any of the positions worked out. FML

#21100
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12765) - you deserved it (43300)

On 02/10/2009 at 3:46pm - intimacy - by Noname (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I sent a text to my boyfriend saying 'Come over and do me.' He never responded. FML

#21094
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42610) - you deserved it (10593)

On 02/10/2009 at 3:46pm - love - by noneofthesex (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my boss asked me to pick up an extra shift. I said I couldn't because I have a date. He told me I didn't need to lie and to just say no next time. FML

#20879
13 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35381) - you deserved it (2337)

On 02/10/2009 at 2:35pm - misc - by Flavorite (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, in basketball practice my coach was putting is in teams to run drills. He points to me and says, "You, go babysit my son by the stage." FML

#20586
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26286) - you deserved it (2482)

On 02/10/2009 at 12:41pm - misc - by nj (woman) - United States (Iowa)



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