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Today, my boyfriend and I broke up. I said that at least I was always there for him when he needed me. He said "When did I need you?" FML

#29762
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31039) - you deserved it (5483)

On 02/12/2009 at 2:04am - misc - by rainyday (woman) - United States (California)

Today, at work, a man walked up the escalator with his chubby kid next to him and asked me where the shoe section was. I said, "For you or your son?" He said, "For my daughter." FML

#29521
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11703) - you deserved it (30423)

On 02/12/2009 at 1:13am - misc - by Mal2222 (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went to a movie with my boyfriend. In the lobby, I asked why the glasses were not working. I said, "Do they only work inside the theater?" My boyfriend replied, "3-D glasses just work inside the movie, everything else in the World is pretty much 3-D." FML

#29434
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10257) - you deserved it (120516)

On 02/12/2009 at 1:00am - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Oregon)

taraaa's comment : ............ is this a joke

See all the comments →

Today, when I tried on a pair of pants at the mall, I asked the salesperson if I could have the next size up. She informed me that there wasn't a next size up. I have to LOSE weight to fit into the biggest pair of pants the store makes. FML

#29334
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15344) - you deserved it (32512)

On 02/12/2009 at 12:45am - misc - by ardenm - United States (California)

Today, I greeted my table (I'm a server) with a colloquial "Hey there, guys, how's it going?" The customers were three butch lesbians who thought I was incorrectly identifying their gender. I received no tip (on a $35 bill), and they registered a corporate complaint about my "insensitivity." FML

#29316
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38018) - you deserved it (4152)

On 02/12/2009 at 12:43am - misc - by ServingYouWings (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I got a text message. It said, "I'm so drunk. What you up to, girl?" It was my dad. FML

#27684
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72239) - you deserved it (3780)

On 02/11/2009 at 9:09pm - misc - by sober (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I found my daughter on Facebook after years of looking for her after the divorce. It turns out it was my ex pretending to be my daughter so she could track me down. FML

#27666
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46388) - you deserved it (5545)

On 02/11/2009 at 9:06pm - misc - by toad (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my mom asked me if I had an eating problem because I've been eating less. I only started eating less because she told me I ate too much. FML

#26986
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33403) - you deserved it (3004)

On 02/11/2009 at 7:06pm - misc - by hungry - United States (Virginia)

Today, I told the guy I have feelings for that I'm interested in, and asked him how he feels about it. He responded via text, saying, "I feel fairly neutral about that." FML

#26983
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27993) - you deserved it (3586)

On 02/11/2009 at 7:06pm - misc - by iwantpizza69 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I told my mom, "I love you". She responded with, "What? I never told you I loved you." FML

#26936
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40770) - you deserved it (2454)

On 02/11/2009 at 6:57pm - misc - by chee (woman) - United States (California)

Today, when my husband got home from work, I was standing in the kitchen, wearing nothing but stilletos. He asked me to make him hot chocolate. FML

#26905
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54685) - you deserved it (5833)

On 02/11/2009 at 6:52pm - misc - by sissica (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, after being in the hospital for 2 days with no visitors, I got my first phone call. It was my best friend asking if he could date my ex girlfriend. FML

#26811
23 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56158) - you deserved it (2126)

On 02/11/2009 at 6:33pm - misc - by EKG (man) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I took my dog to the vet and she was diagnosed with obesity. The vet then told me that dogs usually imitate their owners eating and behavior habits. FML

#26407
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17120) - you deserved it (22423)

On 02/11/2009 at 5:05pm - animals - by qwertyasdfghzxcv - Canada (Ontario)



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