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Man or woman?

Today, I talked to my boss about the fact that I have been diagnosed as bipolar and I am having a really hard time with it. He told me to look on the bright side, now that I'm crazy I will never have to do Jury Duty. FML

#4725
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19591) - you deserved it (2961)

On 02/01/2009 at 1:08pm - health - by crazymuch - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I walked in on my Mum and Dad having sex and didn't even realize what they were doing until she shouted at him to go harder. FML

#4715
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36407) - you deserved it (4117)

On 02/01/2009 at 12:38pm - intimacy - by Bear - United Kingdom (Reading)

Today, I was talking to my friend about my life and she stopped me mid-sentence and told me that my life makes her sad. FML

#4714
9 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21858) - you deserved it (2439)

On 02/01/2009 at 12:37pm - misc - by why... - United States (Michigan)

Today, I had a wet dream. When I woke up, I was touching myself. Unfortunately, I also woke up to find that I had fallen asleep on the couch after eating too much at a family reunion. When I looked around the room, over 10 relatives were giving me nasty looks. FML

#4708
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33492) - you deserved it (7241)

On 02/01/2009 at 12:29pm - misc - by frankrizzo - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I'm a shy guy normally, and when I talk to my friends I don't keep eye contact so I always look down even when I'm listening. My friend asked me why I always look at her boobs. FML

#4684
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9907) - you deserved it (19139)

On 02/01/2009 at 11:48am - misc - by foo - United States (Illinois)

Today, my friend caught me watching a movie on Oxygen instead of the Super Bowl. I'm a guy. FML

#4679
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6615) - you deserved it (25331)

On 02/01/2009 at 11:45am - misc - by Miko - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, it was good fun getting this nice vampire make-up at my drama lesson. It would have been better if I hadn't forgotten my demake-up. Even better if I could have avoided those crazy glances in the bus home. FML

#4648
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5449) - you deserved it (16122)

On 02/01/2009 at 10:52am - misc - by anaph0re - Sent from mobile version

Today, I made my new girlfriend orgasm for the first time. All she said after was "I drooled a little". FML

#4642
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31218) - you deserved it (4946)

On 02/01/2009 at 10:48am - intimacy - by nicknack22 - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was refilling some guy's iced tea at bandana's, and the uppity jerk had the gall to ask me if I ever kissed a girl considering how fat I am, how high my voice is, and how little money I make. FML

#4601
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25846) - you deserved it (2716)

On 02/01/2009 at 9:41am - work - by sportskidguru - United States (Missouri)

Today, I asked the girl I like if she wanted to go to the movies, she said yes and I said I'd let her pick the movie. She picked the movie, "Just Friends". FML

#4600
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26070) - you deserved it (3166)

On 02/01/2009 at 9:40am - love - by JLoRd - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I slept with this new guy for the first time. After sex, he said the doggie style position was fun, it made him wonder what it would be like to rape a girl. FML

#4489
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60247) - you deserved it (5124)

On 02/01/2009 at 5:53am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my roommate has gone home for the weekend. She forgot to turn her alarm clock off. Her door is locked. FML

#4487
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25796) - you deserved it (1248)

On 02/01/2009 at 5:43am - misc - by leez - United States (Virginia)

Today, I masturbated 3 times to the thought of my wife because we don't have sex anymore. FML

#4484
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56728) - you deserved it (6721)

On 02/01/2009 at 5:27am - intimacy - by SuperJesus - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)



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