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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I had a job interview. I have a nervous tendency to rub my foot against the bar under the table. After the interview I noticed I had been rubbing my foot against the interviewer's leg. FML

#3032403
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20877) - you deserved it (35119)

On 06/19/2009 at 3:00pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my phone died. I plugged it in to charge and then went out to run some errands. When I returned, my phone was no where to be found, and our shovel was on the floor, muddy and wet. I then discovered my 6-year old son had buried my "dead" 200$ palmpilot because he had felt sorry for me. FML

#3030718
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43767) - you deserved it (6220)

On 06/19/2009 at 1:57pm - kids - by no_service (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my mom thought it would be a good idea to see what websites I go on from my computer while I wasn't home. She clicked the link that gave my computer a virus that I just got rid of a few days ago. FML

#3030585
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42159) - you deserved it (4898)

On 06/19/2009 at 1:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, a little girl standing next to me on the train suddenly hugged me. I thought maybe she was sad or I reminded her of someone, and hugged her back. Then she smiled, squeezed my lovehandles, and said "Honk, honk!" FML

#3030449
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39914) - you deserved it (6269)

On 06/19/2009 at 1:48pm - kids - by squeezable (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I woke up extremely hungover. I couldn't find my car keys so I went out to my car to see if I had locked them inside. I walked back to the door of my apartment barefoot and empty handed, only to find that I had locked myself out of the apartment. FML

#3030130
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9603) - you deserved it (39928)

On 06/19/2009 at 1:34pm - misc - by crap (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I took my dog for a walk. It became friendly with another dog, and I reached down to pet them both. Suddenly, an old woman runs up to me and whacks me with her cane repeatedly. Apparently, her previous dog had been kidnapped by a woman who looked a lot like me. FML

#3029108
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42124) - you deserved it (2433)

On 06/19/2009 at 12:53pm - animals - by anon - United States (Washington)

Today, I was walking to work and saw three guys sitting at a table outside. One of the guys looks at me and says to his friends, "That's the girl that works at the grocery store. She replaced the hot chick." The other two guys glared at me. FML

#3028813
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41761) - you deserved it (3116)

On 06/19/2009 at 12:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my boss came over to my desk and struck up a casual conversation about movies. After a while, he sat on the edge of my desk, nodded toward my chest, and said in the same casual, lighthearted tone, "And nice cleavage today. Keep that up." FML

#3028643
373 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53388) - you deserved it (12569)

On 06/19/2009 at 12:32pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had a bath in the bathroom we are currently renovating. There's a big hole in the middle of the floor. When I got out of the bath, I swung one leg across the gap to get a towel from the rack. I drew back my leg and looked down to see my brother's hot friend staring up at me in horror. FML

#3025655
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45851) - you deserved it (19147)

On 06/19/2009 at 9:51am - misc - by ilikeirishducks (woman) - Italy

Today, I was mugged on my way to the bus stop. With no money or mobile I started to panic about the exam I had and ran the 3.5 miles to get to there. When I staggered up to the building only 20mins after the exam started, the university staff wouldn't let me sit it as I couldn't prove my identity. FML

#3022587
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53578) - you deserved it (2542)

On 06/19/2009 at 4:22am - misc - by verrine - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I was finally going to fall asleep at a decent hour. Having insomnia, I generally get about 2 hours of sleep. Right as I'm about to fall asleep, 5 firetrucks decide to drive right in front of my house with the sirens/lights on. FML

#3021035
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42230) - you deserved it (4247)

On 06/19/2009 at 2:41am - misc - by insomniac (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I went through the drive through at Dunkin Donuts and asked for an iced coffee. After no response I start frantically screaming about bad service. After a while, the woman comes out to my car and says, "Please pull up to the speaker." I yelled at a garbage bin for 5 minutes. FML

#3019033
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11662) - you deserved it (111192)

On 06/19/2009 at 1:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

kscott88's comment : YDI for being psychotic AND stupid.

See all the comments →

Today, the weather was nice so I decided to eat outside. I quickly found out that my new, expensive hair conditioner attracts bees. Lots of bees. FML

#3017474
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41762) - you deserved it (6198)

On 06/19/2009 at 12:32am - health - by Stung (woman) - United States (Illinois)



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