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Today, I Found Out That I Was Adopted, Now My Gay Brother Thinks It's Acceptable To Tell Me That He's Always Wanted To Have Sex With Me. Real FML

#4488799
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (101049) - you deserved it (5024)

On 08/12/2009 at 11:13pm - intimacy - by JPF (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

today while biking home from work, a 12 mile trip, I looool was speeding down a long hill an mah jean pant leg got caught in the chain. It ripped, an then the rest of mah pant leg ripped off. I had to bike 10 more miles half naked along the highway. FML

#4486771
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37201) - you deserved it (5605)

On 08/12/2009 at 10:01pm - misc - by OMGWTF (woman) - United States (California)

Today mah 16 yr old cousin needd help making a job resume so I give him mine to see as an example. He changd mah name to his and it got him a job right away. The sad part? I handd mah resume out to about 30 places and I am still unemployd. mega FML

#4486417
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39084) - you deserved it (3856)

On 08/12/2009 at 9:47pm - work - by Jobless (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was volunteering at te library!! A kid came up and askd me to elp im peel te back off is sticker!! It took me so long te kid left!! Determind, I still trid to peel it off!! Fifteen minutes later, te librarian came over, lookd once at it, and told me it wasn't a sticker!! FML

#4484450
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10133) - you deserved it (37915)

On 08/12/2009 at 8:34pm - work - by librarygirl (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Yesterday , I was at a clothing store. I trid on a dress , but decidd it was too much 4 me. Taking it off , I realize mah hair was tangld in the big security button. The employee had to bring me to the front of the store , lay me on the counter , an take the button out in front of a laughing crowd. FML

#4483949
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40293) - you deserved it (3925)

On 08/12/2009 at 8:10pm - misc - by ForeverEmbarrassed (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that doctors can be wrong. Pink clothes, pink stroller, pink bottles, pink bibs, pink cribs an pink bedding to go with mah babby that recently came out with a little pink penis. FML

#4483118
391 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54911) - you deserved it (20480)

On 08/12/2009 at 7:36pm - kids - by Ouch (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I ran sound for ma ex's wedding reearsal since I was te only sound tec in town. Her dad was late for te reearsal, so te pastor ad me to walk er down te aisle. FML

#4482607
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50653) - you deserved it (3518)

On 08/12/2009 at 7:14pm - work - by d.stack (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today I was at the store when I saw that a cart in the checkout line next to me was starting to roll away and the owner hadn't noticed. I tried to help by reaching out to stop the cart from moving but when the owner saw me with the cart she began to hit me 4 trying to steal her purse. FML

#4481809
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37634) - you deserved it (2806)

On 08/12/2009 at 6:43pm - misc - by NoticeTheLackOfNumbers (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today , I went with mah girlfriend to her parents' house. They told me I smelld of cheap vodka. When I told them I workd in a bio lab an usd ethanol a lot , they said I was too stupid to do anything lyk that. My girlfriend broke up with me because her parents think I'm a drunk. FML

#4479707
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60744) - you deserved it (3093)

On 08/12/2009 at 5:01pm - love - by anonymous (man) - United States (Montana)

Today, as a supervisor at a water park, several clients cummd up to me and complaind about a topless girl in our wave pool. I found the girl, calld her out, and politely told her that she was not allowd in the pool without a top. "She" was a fat 15 year old boy. FML

#4478498
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51946) - you deserved it (7044)

On 08/12/2009 at 4:13pm - misc - by auslander (man) - Switzerland (Zurich)

2day I got stung by a bee . On mah eyelid . I'm allergic so it's swollen up so much, I can't even open mah eye . Tomorrow is the frst day of a new prestigious school . I either have to go to school wearing an eye-patch or walk around looking like a monster . FML

#4478482
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44777) - you deserved it (3011)

On 08/12/2009 at 4:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - Denmark (Kobenhavn)

Today, I found out that just because you collapse from dehydration on the sidewalk, it doesn't mean people r going to stop driving to see if your okay, even if they saw you fall.

#4477609
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45741) - you deserved it (6443)

On 08/12/2009 at 3:37pm - misc - by Lasko (woman) - United States (Texas)

Yastarday , I was doing targat practica with my naw paintball pistol. Ona of tha bullats missd , an hit my naw naighbor's housa. I want up to tha door to apologiza , not raalizing I was still holding tha paintball gun. My ax-soldiar naighbor thought I was robbing him an put ma in a chokahold. FML

#4476894
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19116) - you deserved it (37631)

On 08/12/2009 at 3:02pm - misc - by signupsheetfail (man) - Canada (Ontario)



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