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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, my girlfriend's best friend was dumped, and was absolutely depressed. My girlfriend thought she'd show her sympathy by breaking up with me so they "could be single together." FML

#6028042
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47000) - you deserved it (2440)

On 10/27/2009 at 7:13pm - love - by dumped (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I noticed that I've been spelling my company's name wrong in my email signature for over a year. FML

#6027287
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7834) - you deserved it (41206)

On 10/27/2009 at 6:24pm - work - by nobodyreadsmyemails (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend was reaching over to give me a hug for no reason. I said "Aww, You're sweet! I love you too!" He looked confused and said, "That's great, but I was reaching for the remote." FML

#6026948
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28534) - you deserved it (6089)

On 10/27/2009 at 5:57pm - love - by Queen_of_Night (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got my tax return. I was really excited. Turns out the government does take the time to send out a tax return for $1.36. FML

#6025394
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27686) - you deserved it (3570)

On 10/27/2009 at 4:10pm - money - by nicolo (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my son's hamster died. It was overweight and got stuck in its plastic tube. My 6 year old son came downstairs to me smashing a plastic tube with a dead hamster in it on the kitchen table. He thinks I killed it. FML

Today, I realized that the only thing I learned from my first serious relationship was how to fake an orgasm. FML

#6024374
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18306) - you deserved it (4143)

On 10/27/2009 at 2:49pm - intimacy - by kjirut (woman) - Norway (Oslo)

Today, I sliced a deep gash into my thumb while carving up bagels. After putting a plaster on, I returned to my room to relax, where I lit a candle. The flame from my new lighter shot up, and set fire to the plaster on my thumb. Now I have a cut AND several burns. FML

#6024330
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29729) - you deserved it (7474)

On 10/27/2009 at 2:46pm - health - by opposableouch (woman) - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today, I bought a nice new dress for a work party. But when I went in, a coworker hurried me into the bathroom saying, "Don't worry we can fix this." She thought someone had been sick on me. Thanks. That was just the pattern of the dress. FML

#6023107
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26032) - you deserved it (6720)

On 10/27/2009 at 12:43pm - work - by yper (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I took a trip to Wal-Mart. There's a car wash that they conveniently built right outside of this Wal-Mart. So as I was leaving, I decided to make use of this car wash, not even thinking about the $200 worth of groceries I had just purchased. I drive a pick-up truck. FML

#6022532
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7876) - you deserved it (62029)

On 10/27/2009 at 11:36am - misc - by dave (man) - United States

Today, I received the newspaper from my hometown. My ex-husband's wedding announcement and picture were on the front page. His new wife has the same first name as me. All my Facebook friends from high school commented on how much weight I've lost and how good I look in my wedding photo. FML

#6021745
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39911) - you deserved it (3256)

On 10/27/2009 at 9:32am - misc - by WasFeelingGood (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my telephone line was hit by lightning. I discovered that not only will lightning fry a router, it will also destroy any PCs connected to that router via network cables. I also discovered that a $10 phone line surge protector would have saved nearly $3,000 worth of PC equipment. FML

#6021416
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13108) - you deserved it (35232)

On 10/27/2009 at 8:32am - misc - by MotherNatureMustDie (man) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, in the gym, as I bent over to pick up my weights an old man farted right in my face. The stench was appalling. To make matters worse, a girl I've fancied for ages thought it was me and reported it to the instructor. I was told to leave for 'anti-social behavior'. FML

#6020793
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34413) - you deserved it (2516)

On 10/27/2009 at 6:28am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)



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