by Anonymous / 12/24/2010 at 10:12am / United States / Money
krystal2424's comment : hahaha well good for him!
Today, as I was riding my bike, I saw a bunch of cute guys checking me out. Not paying attention, I then ran into a parked police car. Besides getting laughed at, I got a ticket for damaging police property. FML
by Anonymous / 12/24/2010 at 9:13am / United States (Tennessee) / Money
by Anonymous / 12/24/2010 at 5:52am / Netherlands / Health
Today, my dad had a go at me because he thought I was embarrassed by him and that was why I never invited any of my friends over. I was too embarrassed to tell him it's actually because I don't have any friends to invite over. FML
by nerdwithagun / 12/24/2010 at 2:15am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to the doctor's to get a checkup. When the nurse stuck the Otoscope into my ear to look, she was disgusted. When she pulled it out, she told me that I had an ear infection, and that she'd popped a pimple in there by mistake. FML
by Anonymous / 12/24/2010 at 2:15am / United States (Texas) / Health
Today, I helped out with makeup at my daughter's high school play. As one girl walked past, I told her that she'd smudged pink lipstick all up the side of her face. Turns out it was a birthmark. She cried in the dressing room for half an hour. FML
by Anonymous / 12/24/2010 at 12:02am / Australia (Victoria) / Kids
by Anonymous / 12/23/2010 at 10:37pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, my fiancé and I attempted to have sex in my childhood bedroom. As we were falling onto the bed, I smacked my head on the wall, which caused a shelf of stuffed toys to fall onto the bed. Not only did it kill the mood, the shelf also hit me in the face. FML
by troubleintoyland / 12/23/2010 at 10:03pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by nick / 12/23/2010 at 9:21pm / United States (Missouri) / Transportation
Today, the grades for one of my courses were released. The class average was higher than that which the department allowed, so the professor had to scale everyone's marks down to meet the policy. I ended up failing because my class was too smart. FML
by dumb4$$0rz / 12/23/2010 at 4:01pm / United States / Miscellaneous
BeautyMonster's comment : Are they even allowed to do that?
Today, while driving, I idly started picking my nose. I looked over at the car next to me and saw a smoking hot guy from my school staring at me in disgust. He kept staring until I took a turn-off. FML
by wench / 12/23/2010 at 3:39pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Transportation
by unfortunategeek / 12/23/2010 at 11:13am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous
DahkLohd's comment : Well, consider yourself lucky that she didn't raise you.
by Username / 12/23/2010 at 9:48am / Canada / Miscellaneous
- Today, it’s been two weeks since I’ve been in Hungary. I make the most of being away from home by… Today, and since forever, my boyfriend talks in his sleep. Last night, he told me, “I like you very… Today, I threw up when I got home because I'd been drinking with friends. My parents asked what was…