Today, at work, someone heard me throw up. I then got called aside and told being hungover at work is unacceptable. I don't drink. I'm pregnant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (57537) - you deserved it (3286)
On 06/25/2009 at 6:29pm - work - by dazedandconfused (woman) - United Kingdom (Harrow)
Today, I brought a friend who I have loved for years out to a nice restaurant for dinner. I ordered an expensive bottle of wine, and poured each of us a glass. As I was about to tell her I loved her, she raised her glass for a toast and said "A toast to friendship!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (51216) - you deserved it (6857)
On 06/25/2009 at 6:24pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, a man from across the bar looked at me, pointed and said "MMMM, now THAT'S what I want." Offended, I confronted him to tell him I felt disrespected by him referring to me as 'that.' Turns out, he was pointing to the cheeseburger that the waitress behind me was holding. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7842) - you deserved it (47994)
On 06/25/2009 at 6:18pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I decided to make pancakes from scratch. I poured the batter in my Perfect Pancake pan. Then I told my brother who was watching, "This is so easy. Just watch." I burned 15 pancakes, including the one I dropped on the burner, which lit on fire, causing the alarm to go off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9870) - you deserved it (47816)
On 06/25/2009 at 3:22pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I went to a yard sale and found a cute plush duck. I sent a pic of it to my friend with the message "Jackpot!" I guess she didn't see the pic because she called me up all excited, thinking my boyfriend of 6 years finally proposed to me. "No, I said, I just found a big duck for $1." FML
I agree, your life sucks (37363) - you deserved it (6385)
On 06/25/2009 at 3:17pm - love - by smallmediumatlrg (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I found my long lost diary and curiously read it. What's worse than finding out that your mother read your diary? Finding out that your mother wrote comments in it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (60856) - you deserved it (3644)
On 06/25/2009 at 3:15pm - misc - by Emptyspace (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, while I was working a customer notified me that the men's restroom need some attention. Thinking that there was just a small mess, I walked into the restroom only to discover someone had taken a crap in the sink. Guess who got to clean it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44097) - you deserved it (2662)
On 06/25/2009 at 12:22pm - work - by KP (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was parking my car outside of my apartment, but the big truck next to the spot went over the line. I squeezed in anyway. Later, I discovered the truck had left and someone keyed my car. They left a note saying, "Good parking job, asshole." FML
I agree, your life sucks (37452) - you deserved it (6512)
On 06/25/2009 at 11:37am - misc - by mickstinator - United States (Texas)
Today, I went to go give my boss a high five for a job well done. I missed his hand and accidentally slapped his ass on the way down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33248) - you deserved it (11162)
On 06/25/2009 at 10:13am - work - by KN (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was awoken by my son squirting liquid on me from a bottle. We have a high deer population in our area, so I spray urine contained in black bottle on my plants to help deter the deer from eating them. I also water my flowers with water from a blue bottle. My son used the black one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32207) - you deserved it (7362)
On 06/25/2009 at 6:17am - misc - by GoldenShower (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was getting a pedicure and the woman sitting next to me asked the lady if she could take the skin she had scraped off my feet home to her birds because they love skin. She then describes for 20 minutes how her birds love to sit on her when her sunburn is peeling and eat her skin. FML
I agree, your life sucks (80868) - you deserved it (3769)
On 06/25/2009 at 4:34am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, after finishing work, my friend was having a party next door and my driveway was blocked. I parked 6 houses down and went to the party for 20mins. After coming out after 3 beers, I went to move my car back to my house and go to sleep. I got a DUI for driving 30 feet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15541) - you deserved it (50302)
On 06/25/2009 at 4:05am - misc - by Noj12345 (man) - United States (California)
Today, was my first day back at work since my wife got breast cancer. I come in and see some people with pink slips and frowns. When I get to my desk I find a pink slip, I go up to my boss and start to curse him out for firing me. Only to find out my pink slip was a fundraiser for my wife. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10922) - you deserved it (54284)
On 06/25/2009 at 3:20am - misc - by YahItsMe94 - United States (New Jersey)
Tuesday 22 July 2014
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