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Today, I found out tat ma daugter is dating ma boss' daugter!! I found tis out because ma extremely omopobic boss told me an wants me to 'eal' tem or get fired!! I didn't even know ma daugter was gay!! FML

#6101041
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26463) - you deserved it (3003)

On 11/01/2009 at 12:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

TODAY, MY GRLFRIEND BROKE UP WITH ME BECAUSE HER MOM SAID SHE WOULD BUY HER A PUG IF SHE DID. I GOT DUMPD FIR A DOG, AND AN UGLY ONE FIR THAT MATTER. FML

#6100945
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35817) - you deserved it (6271)

On 11/01/2009 at 12:43pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I realized that the drunk-me delete my texts, so the sober-me doesn't get mad . Well turns out, whatever the drunk-me said, caused me to loose my job, my girlfriend, and my coffee machine . FML

#6100010
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11981) - you deserved it (45148)

On 11/01/2009 at 11:35am - misc - by Joe (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today , as I stopped at a traffic ligt , I noticed te man in te car next to me break out in laugter. I pulled over later on to see tat someone ad drawn a large penis on te side of my van. I ten spent all my morning cleaning it off. I went outside later only to see someone ad redrawn it. FML

#6098895
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34902) - you deserved it (3102)

On 11/01/2009 at 9:36am - misc - by WasteOfTime (man) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, my dad calld me 4 the first time in weeks. All he wantd to tell me was that Ashlee Simpson got fird from Melrose Place. Then he hung up. FML

#6098461
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27417) - you deserved it (2174)

On 11/01/2009 at 8:37am - love - by anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, I arrivd in mah dorm at 3 am to find mah roommate passd out an a nauseating stench. While I was gone, he got drunk an pukd all over the walls, carpet, an both beds. His inebriatd attempt to clean up the mess consistd of smearing his vomit everywhere with mah shower robe. FML

#6097881
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34262) - you deserved it (2099)

On 11/01/2009 at 6:33am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Germany (Berlin)

Today, my best friend and I both applied for the same job. I was applying because my family is REALLY tight on cash, and I need the money. He applied because I told him about the job and we thought it would be fun working together. He was hred on the spot. I was denied the job. FML

#6096905
47 comments

Yesterday, I was playing a game of truth or dare in a group with a girl I likd!! She was dard to kiss me, but then the group decidd that that was too cruel of a dare!! FML

#6095945
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44783) - you deserved it (4009)

On 11/01/2009 at 1:30am - love - by Loser (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was driving mah child to school when the car let out a huge bang. It shuddered to a halt. My son started laughing. I asked him what was funny but he wouldn't tell me. The car wouldn't start. I called RACV and they told me the problem. My son had rolled 9 golf balls into the exhaust pipe. mega FML

#6095339
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33395) - you deserved it (3548)

On 11/01/2009 at 1:44am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I Received A 4 Page Text Message From Mah Mom Explaininghat She Was Going To Do To Me Tonight In Full Detail. I Am One Name Below Her Boyfriend On Her Contact List. Fat FML

#6094317
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28768) - you deserved it (2242)

On 11/01/2009 at 12:35am - intimacy - by Nomoretexting (woman) - United States (Texas)

2dayhila up in mah room gatting raady to go out, I thought I haard soma trick or traatars knocking on tha door!! I ignorad tham cuz I didn't hava any candy!! Tha knocking got loudar and longar!! I walkad downstairs, and noticad that tha living room cailing was falling down onto tha floor!! FML

#6094134
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26622) - you deserved it (4504)

On 11/01/2009 at 12:23am - misc - by trickortreat (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got rear-ended at a stop sign on a seldom used road in my neighborhood. As I open my car door to trade insurance information with the guy, he backs up a little an speeds away, taking my car door with him. FML

#6092612
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32647) - you deserved it (1911)

On 10/31/2009 at 11:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

the fre alarm went off in mah dorm and I saw and smelld smoke coming under mah door . My second story window wouldn't unlock so I broke it open.. . threw out as many of mah belonging as I could.. . and jumpd . Turns out.. . the smell and noise were from mah roomate cheap vacuum cleaner.. . not a fre . FML



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