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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, I bought a fake "wedding ring" at Target to play a prank on my parents. They kicked me out, saying my "fiancé" can take care of me now. There is no fiancé, and I just lost my job. FML

#7420544
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10271) - you deserved it (37629)

On 01/18/2010 at 3:12pm - love - by Crissylove10 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom asked me to clean beneath my brother's bed for money. I found a rotten apple, a picture of my best friend, and a dead bird. I got $10. FML

#7420452
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30405) - you deserved it (4528)

On 01/18/2010 at 3:04pm - kids - by Brotherssuckkk - Sent from mobile version

Today, I saw Avatar in iMax 3D. Towards the end of the movie I jump, yelled, and spilled my drink all over the people in front of me because I thought a burning piece of ash landed on my leg. FML

#7420150
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8662) - you deserved it (41790)

On 01/18/2010 at 2:39pm - misc - by burnedboy (man) - United States

Today, I woke up to find my freshly dry-cleaned $200 suit not on my bed. Instead I found my drunk ex-girlfriend. Not only did she break into my house, she decided that she wanted to sleep in my bed and threw my suit into the trash. I have a job interview today and the garbage men already came. FML

#7418364
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27667) - you deserved it (2524)

On 01/18/2010 at 12:05pm - misc - by Sam (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got a letter in the mail, my mother has applied for a reduction in her child support payments for my brother and I. She's paid $10 child support in 16 years. FML

#7416712
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32263) - you deserved it (2000)

On 01/18/2010 at 9:23am - money - by bluewatersify - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)

Today, I received a message from front desk that my concerned father is trying to contact me. I call only to hear that my parents were freaking out that I wasn't answering my phone. They saw me 9 hours ago. They were going to call the police. I'm in college and also don't live with them anymore. FML

#7416105
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28260) - you deserved it (2100)

On 01/18/2010 at 7:28am - misc - by over_protected (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my estranged, alcoholic father decided to tell me I have a sister. After 30 mins of him describing how beautiful she is and how much we look alike and how she has lived one town away from me her entire life, I was excited to the point of tears. Too bad she died a year ago. Thanks dad. FML

#7415965
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43107) - you deserved it (2138)

On 01/18/2010 at 6:49am - misc - by Mills (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I was vacuuming our house because I wanted to help my parents. I wore a headset while listening to REALLY loud music. The vacuuming job took me two hours and when I took of my headset I noticed that I hadn't started the vacuum cleaner. FML

#7415658
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10164) - you deserved it (61751)

On 01/18/2010 at 6:01am - misc - by Adrian16 (man) - Norway (Vestfold)

Today, my rabbit died. He died a painful death from ingesting too much carpet. I now have no rabbit and a patchy carpet. FML

#7414991
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25601) - you deserved it (6031)

On 01/18/2010 at 4:00am - misc - by Radioo (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I tried to quit my job. My boss just looked at me and said, "No. You can't quit." FML

#7414727
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31665) - you deserved it (6428)

On 01/18/2010 at 3:28am - work - by toolegittoquit (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I received a letter saying that I was accepted into university and that I qualified for a number of scholarships. Too bad an equivalent sum of money will be spent fixing the car I hit, after spinning out on ice, whilst driving home from said university. FML

#7413035
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24266) - you deserved it (4534)

On 01/18/2010 at 1:36am - misc - by trooper93 (man) - Canada

Today, I was helping my friend put up a wooden fence at his new house. I was holding the sections of fence up while he nailed them in with an air powered nail gun. The gun malfunctioned and fired twice putting the second nail through my hand and into the wood. We had to pry the nail out. FML

#7412536
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33672) - you deserved it (2610)

On 01/18/2010 at 1:09am - misc - by Nissan_David (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out my boyfriend of two years role-plays on the internet, pretending to have sex with men. His response when I confronted him about it? "Which specific incidents are you referring to?" FML

#7412437
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20536) - you deserved it (2668)

On 01/18/2010 at 1:03am - intimacy - by heterolifepartner (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)



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