Today, I was sitting next to the guy I like and he was doing homework. Then, he looks up, his eyes meeting mine. His smooth voice mutters my name as his face inches closer to mine. I can feel his minty breath against my face. My pulse is racing. Then, he says "What's a pronoun?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (51302) - you deserved it (10019)
On 04/26/2009 at 9:14pm - love - by theatreismylife (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my family and I drove to a mall an hour away. We split up, and I went into a store by myself. A little later, I get a call from my brother asking me where I am. They had already left to go home and didn't notice me missing from the car. They were already halfway home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51421) - you deserved it (2381)
On 04/26/2009 at 7:44pm - misc - by chippuh (woman) - United States (California)
Today, after driving a few hours late at night I decided to entertain the car tailgating me by not letting him pass. After doing this for 3miles, reaching 93MPH, I decided to let the car pass me. When I switched lanes, the car tailgating me light up in red and blue. It was a cop. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7924) - you deserved it (69076)
On 04/26/2009 at 5:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I went to my cousin's communion. We came late and walked to the front of the church where my family was. Everyone stared and laughed but I ignored it. After the service was done my mom came up to me and pulled a long piece of toilet paper out of my skirt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36024) - you deserved it (10716)
On 04/26/2009 at 3:15pm - misc - by skjjj (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my fiancée got out of the shower, completely shaved. I went over to her, wrapped her in a hug and asked her what the occasion was. She pulled away and said that she had a gyno appointment. My fiancée will clean up for the gyno, but not for me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44275) - you deserved it (7560)
On 04/26/2009 at 3:15pm - love - by jimboxo (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my boyfriend was going to propose. Since he was really nervous, he decided to have a couple of drinks to loosen up. He ended up throwing up and passing out before he could get down on one knee. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47569) - you deserved it (4082)
On 04/26/2009 at 3:12pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I went to a concert. They had this feature where you could send a picture of something from your cell phone and they'd put it on the big screens, so I sent a picture of myself in. When the picture came up on the screens, the entire crowd of about 4,000 people went, "Ewwww!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (72888) - you deserved it (26633)
On 04/26/2009 at 12:49pm - misc - by apparentlyugly (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was snuggling with my neighbors four week old kitten while babysitting their kids. I fell asleep, rolled over, and woke up next to a dead kitten. FML
I agree, your life sucks (64679) - you deserved it (48030)
On 04/26/2009 at 12:45pm - misc - by Fykkhttdsetkkhvln - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was taking a nap while my mom was at work. I woke up when she came home and didn't think anything of it so I went back to sleep. When I woke up again, I went downstairs and our 52" plasma screen TV, my xbox 360, and $1500 computer were all stolen. I'm guessing that wasn't my mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50947) - you deserved it (9379)
On 04/26/2009 at 12:21pm - misc - by fuckMYlife94321 (man) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I got kicked in the face at a soccer game. Everybody clapped. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59495) - you deserved it (8423)
On 04/26/2009 at 11:14am - misc - by Tal (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I found out that the noise I thought was a mouse in my room was a water bottle shaking when my refrigerator turned on. I stayed up till 4am looking for a mouse that didn't exist. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14019) - you deserved it (31551)
On 04/26/2009 at 11:13am - animals - by alikat (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I woke to find my boyfriend of 2 years gone. I saw my little sister's talking bear at the bottom of my bed, it said "squeeze me" so I squeezed it and it said "it's over." It was my boyfriends voice. I was dumped by a talking bear. FML
I agree, your life sucks (74970) - you deserved it (4021)
On 04/26/2009 at 8:35am - love - by shawty_x (woman) - United Kingdom (Hartlepool)
Today, I was at a pool party. Standing outside of the pool, I was hesitant about taking my shirt off. A girl in the pool shouted "Hey, you're not the only fat one here, don't feel bad!". I was worried about what my friends would think of my new bellybutton ring, I don't think I'm fat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52856) - you deserved it (6986)
On 04/26/2009 at 5:47am - misc - by TheRawrza (woman) - United States (Florida)
Friday 6 December 2013
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↑ randomsloth's comment : hbahahah omfg thats priceless
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