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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, my father made his bellybutton talk. In front of my new boyfriend. FML

#12049676
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34260) - you deserved it (4299)

On 07/22/2010 at 7:14pm - love - by coffee_princess (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I lied to a group of 8 year olds about having a boyfriend. FML

#12049549
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19689) - you deserved it (30544)

On 07/22/2010 at 7:08pm - love - by jennavankirk - United States

Today, I put on some skimpy shorts and bent down to get something on the bottom shelf of the fridge to get my boyfriend's attention. On my way up, I slammed my head on the edge of the fridge. FML

#12044097
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13874) - you deserved it (44183)

On 07/22/2010 at 12:46pm - love - by Nic (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I lifted up my blinds, only for them to detach from the wall, hit me on the head, knock a pile of paper over, spill a can of Pepsi, leave plaster all over the floor and a gaping hole in the wall above my window. FML

#12043060
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34463) - you deserved it (4067)

On 07/22/2010 at 11:10am - misc - by Elliot (man) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, while lifeguarding, I saw someone in the wave-pool who appeared to be drowning. So, I jumped in to attempt to save him. Turns out he wasn't drowning, he only had one arm. He yelled at me. FML

#12042807
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34383) - you deserved it (4668)

On 07/22/2010 at 10:48am - work - by GuardOtto - United States

Today, my girlfriend's father sent me a text message that simply stated "You ruined my relationship with my daughter." I wanted to ask him for his blessing to marry his daughter. FML

#12038820
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36144) - you deserved it (3186)

On 07/22/2010 at 2:44am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, while having sex for our first time, my boyfriend decided to test out a theory he heard about, that conversation during sex makes it more enjoyable. His way of doing it? He looked me straight in the eye and asked "How 'bout them Brewers?" We're from Wisconsin. That's our local sports team. FML

#12037742
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33151) - you deserved it (5072)

On 07/22/2010 at 1:52am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. After removing my underwear, he started singing "In the jungle, the mighty jungle..." FML

#12030730
313 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27583) - you deserved it (52213)

On 07/21/2010 at 7:44pm - intimacy - by Wawawiwa (woman) - Namibia (Windhoek)

Lozza111's comment : haha, your bf is awesome, stop complaining

See all the comments →

Today, I brought my boyfriend of a year and a half to meet my parents. Turns out he dated my mom. This should be a fun dinner. FML

#12027756
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51061) - you deserved it (6037)

On 07/21/2010 at 4:31pm - love - by highlandgirl10 (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found out that my husband was trying to cheat on me while I was away at basic training. I signed up for the service to pay off his debt. FML

#12026889
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40771) - you deserved it (5572)

On 07/21/2010 at 3:32pm - love - by Jessi - United States

Today, I got a call from my grandmother saying she locked her keys in the car and I needed to bring her the spares. After an hour bus ride, involving me missing my stop and getting temporarily lost, I arrived and handed her the keys. I brought the wrong ones. FML

#12023647
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16558) - you deserved it (30063)

On 07/21/2010 at 12:09pm - misc - by Syrinth (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mom found my pack of cigarettes. She's now making me go to rehab. I had only smoked one cigarette ever just to try it. I didn't even like it. FML

#12023644
319 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19613) - you deserved it (45592)

On 07/21/2010 at 12:08pm - misc - by Goody2shoes (man) - India (Maharashtra)

Today, I came home to my boyfriend wearing one of my pads on his hand, because he didn't want to pay to go to the hospital for stitches. FML

#12022109
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31647) - you deserved it (3979)

On 07/21/2010 at 9:52am - health - by blank - United States



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