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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I found out the presentation I've been looking forward to and preparing for months only has three people registered to attend. I'll be talking to an empty room for an hour. FML

#6180723
20 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23270) - you deserved it (2179)

On 11/06/2009 at 10:22am - misc - by kernelkat (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, at a party a fly flew into my mouth. I spit it out, and in an effort to wash out my mouth I grabbed the can of coke that was on the table next to me. Apparently people had been spitting in there and using it as an ashtray. FML

#6180431
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30080) - you deserved it (8573)

On 11/06/2009 at 9:31am - misc - by Anonymous - Denmark (Kobenhavn)

Today, I dropped my keys in the toilet. While in the kitchen looking for something to fish them out with, I heard a door slam. My sister had to use the bathroom and didn’t see my keys in the toilet before sitting down. Lucky me, I caught her just as she was about to flush. FML

#6179054
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24979) - you deserved it (4789)

On 11/06/2009 at 3:57am - misc - by ShittyKeys (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went out to celebrate my birthday with a big group of friends. After waiting in line to get into a club, the bouncer looked me up and down and said, "No fat chicks." My friends went into the club without me and left me to take a $100 taxi home alone. FML

#6178277
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38886) - you deserved it (7570)

On 11/06/2009 at 1:59am - misc - by obese_chicken (woman) - Australia

Today, my mom texted me in the middle of my end of term math exam, saying it was extremely urgent and needed me to come home ASAP. While skipping my exam, I finally got home to find out my mom forgot what the emergency was. FML

#6178217
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29815) - you deserved it (5293)

On 11/06/2009 at 1:52am - misc - by failedexam (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I saw my grandmother. All of my cousins and I went to say "hi" to her, one by one. When I got up to her and said, "Hi grandma!", she said in Chinese, "I don't remember this one." FML

#6177854
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30460) - you deserved it (2148)

On 11/06/2009 at 1:13am - misc - by ForgottenKid (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend told his best friend to text my sister telling her to tell me that he was breaking up with me. FML

#6177758
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28933) - you deserved it (2554)

On 11/06/2009 at 1:06am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I suffered a mental breakdown. I told my roommates about it, and they decided to throw a very loud party while I was sobbing in my room, unable to sleep. My Xanax prescription ran out, I have no more sick days, and I have to wake up in two hours to work a ten hour day. FML

#6177742
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31714) - you deserved it (6824)

On 11/06/2009 at 1:05am - health - by sadparty (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, at work I wrote up my boyfriend (whom I've been secretly dating, because I'm his supervisor) for being $40 short on his register. Our policy is to write up anyone short over $10. He got mad and told my boss we're dating, and I was instantly fired. Then I got dumped for being a "tattle-tale". FML

#6175631
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27382) - you deserved it (16394)

On 11/05/2009 at 10:43pm - work - by supervisor (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, a customer complimented me on how good I looked for my age. She thought I was in my forties. I'm 18. FML

#6175316
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32486) - you deserved it (3595)

On 11/05/2009 at 10:29pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I got to work in the ER at the local hospital. A lady came in with high blood sugar. She was concerned because the same thing happened to her husband. I reassured her, telling her she'll be back with her husband in an hour or so. Her husband died four years ago from something similar. FML

#6172287
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25468) - you deserved it (6772)

On 11/05/2009 at 7:40pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I finally finished my art project which was worth 50% of my quarterly grade. I came in 1st period to give it to her. When she turned to look at it, her elbow hit her coffee and spilled it all over the canvas. I got 60%. She said I would have had a 100%, except for the giant coffee stain. FML

#6169952
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56019) - you deserved it (2987)

On 11/05/2009 at 5:14pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I was doing my paper route. I throw the papers onto people's driveways while sitting on the back of my dad's truck. To be funny my dad decided to suddenly speed up, causing me to fall off the back of the truck, face first onto the road. He didn't realize I fell off and kept driving. FML

#6169373
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30813) - you deserved it (3773)

On 11/05/2009 at 4:33pm - misc - by Xero_316 (man) - Canada (Ontario)



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