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Today, I woke up to find my car broken into. They also took the inhaler that fell out of my bag the night before. The one I needed to stop the asthma attack I had from the stress of having my car broken into. FML

#6403775
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33502) - you deserved it (2396)

On 11/22/2009 at 11:49am - health - by trying2breathe (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, as I woke up early to do my physics homework, I heard my parents talk about how big a disappointment I am for them. They discussed how stupid, immature and how big a burden I was. They knew I was listening. FML

#6403187
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34017) - you deserved it (4062)

On 11/22/2009 at 10:39am - misc - by Cerezo (man) - Guatemala (Guatemala)

Today, I was finally able to hang out with a girl I really liked at a party. We had a great time and spent hours together. When I leaned in for a kiss at the end of the night, she stopped me and said that "you're a great guy, but we can't go out because you'll be bad for my social reputation." FML

#6403006
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35177) - you deserved it (3307)

On 11/22/2009 at 10:11am - love - by Jason (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I helped an old man with his groceries, because he was struggling and he had a cane. After, I was nice enough to drive him home. He went to thank me by giving me a kiss on the cheek. Then he stuck his tongue out, and tried to French kiss me. FML

#6402525
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34618) - you deserved it (5609)

On 11/22/2009 at 8:53am - misc - by mjperfetti84 (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I saw my cat outside taking a dump. I pulled back the curtain and watched him clean it up, because I found it fascinating that animals can do that. I must have been standing there for several minutes before I noticed the neighbour next door looking at me being fascinated by my cat pooing. FML

#6401579
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7710) - you deserved it (32251)

On 11/22/2009 at 4:15am - animals - by jaydiv (woman) - Australia (Tasmania)

Today, my manager sent me a text message with a picture of Santa masturbating, with a message that said he wished me a white Christmas. FML

#6401581
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21256) - you deserved it (3796)

On 11/22/2009 at 4:15am - intimacy - by lonewolf2701 - United States

Today, when putting something away on a high shelf, something small and black fell down my cleavage. I thought nothing of it and finished the task at hand. When I pulled out the neck of my shirt later to find it and looked down, glaring up at me from my boobs was a large, disgruntled spider. FML

#6401291
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22249) - you deserved it (4043)

On 11/22/2009 at 3:35am - intimacy - by Arachnaphobic (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my boyfriend came home drunk and thought it would be funny to spray himself in the face with pepper spray. I was in his drunken firing line too. After him vomiting and being blinded for a few hours, he was fine. I, on the other hand, had a terrible allergic reaction and got rushed to hospital. FML

#6400786
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26880) - you deserved it (4990)

On 11/22/2009 at 2:41am - misc - by jayne_dhoe (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my boss called me into her office to tell me I needed to mind my own business and not question everything my newest co-worker does. Yesterday, I stopped the new girl from giving $6,000 to the wrong person. I was fired on the spot. The new girl was promoted into my job. FML

#6400678
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37297) - you deserved it (2520)

On 11/22/2009 at 2:31am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I got diagnosed with stomach ulcers. They are very painful, and I have been throwing up blood. On my latest trip to the toilet, I was heaving and the pain was making me beat the floor with my fist, the toilet lid decided to come crashing down on my head, giving me a minor concussion. FML

#6397503
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31059) - you deserved it (3394)

On 11/21/2009 at 11:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was babysitting my younger brother while my parents were away. I turned my back on my brother for one minute and then I heard a huge crash from their room. He had somehow destroyed a family heirloom and 200 year old clock. FML

#6397427
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24907) - you deserved it (6937)

On 11/21/2009 at 11:05pm - kids - by Rhianna (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, my daughter was playing outside. I was watching her from the window, and I saw her pick up a dead bird. I ran outside to grab her. As I picked her up and started scolding her, she tried to scratch my face. In the attempt, her hand went straight into my mouth. FML

#6396436
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26236) - you deserved it (6084)

On 11/21/2009 at 10:25pm - animals - by gbabyy (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I woke up in my roommate's bed. Apparently, the previous night I sleep-walked into her room, layed on her bed, and fell asleep. In the middle of her and her boyfriend having sex. He's now going around saying he slept with both of us. FML

#6394262
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19457) - you deserved it (3920)

On 11/21/2009 at 8:33pm - intimacy - by sleepwalker - United States (South Carolina)



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