by KidCudi227 / 07/19/2011 at 1:42am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
by nataliepaige / 07/19/2011 at 12:43am / Canada (Ontario) / Health
Today, I was laying in bed making out with a girl. After trying to figure out for a while why she was spending so much time on my neck it finally hit me. She was frantically and secretly trying to remove the gum she got stuck in my hair. She failed. FML
by tLee / 07/19/2011 at 12:04am / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy
klutzyduck1's comment : You have to admit this is one of those cute funny moments, I hope you laughed instead of acting pissed. Enjoy it, you can't change it.
by RobinBunny713 / 07/18/2011 at 11:23pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy
xgetxbentx's comment : awww nerd love.
Today, my boyfriend and his bandmates were doing a live interview for a web show. Drunk off his ass, my boyfriend starts telling the internet how his ex-girlfriend is his biggest inspiration. I was standing right next to him. FML
by Btwigster / 07/18/2011 at 9:20pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love
Today, I was at a restaurant with my son when he started to choke on his food. Panicked, I grabbed the closest drink I could reach and made him gulp it down. Only when I received tons of dirty looks from people at other tables did I realize I had given him beer. My son is 8. FML
by stargirl / 07/18/2011 at 8:36pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids
mrmystery96's comment : I say let the little bastard drink.
by Anonymous / 07/18/2011 at 4:21pm / Netherlands (Utrecht) / Intimacy
Today, I was at work when someone came in asking me to brush their pet shih tzu. After an hour of vigorously grooming through the multiple knots, I called the owner to collect their dog. When she got here she said, "Oh, did I say brush? I meant shave." FML
by StudMuffinette / 07/18/2011 at 3:40pm / United States (Texas) / Work
by Daria_Weiner / 07/18/2011 at 2:23pm / Russian Federation (Moscow City) / Love
by unbirthday / 07/18/2011 at 2:05pm / United States / Animals
by deeenalynn / 07/18/2011 at 12:22pm / Canada (Alberta) / Health
by womanlover12345 / 07/18/2011 at 12:05pm / Spain / Love
Today, I woke up to a scream downstairs. My 13 year-old daughter was trying to bite her little brother's neck. No matter how hard I try, she will not believe that she is NOT and NEVER WILL BE a vampire. FML
by xBubbles38 / 07/18/2011 at 11:17am / United States / Kids