by Anonymous / 07/24/2011 at 4:21pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
mk58's comment : Jealous bitch.
Today, I went out for coffee with my sister and my crush. I spent the majority of the date flirting with my crush, and when he dropped us off at home, I told him I had fun on our date. He looked at me surprised and said he'd thought I'd tagged along on his date with my sister. FML
by Lonely / 07/24/2011 at 1:02pm / United States (Ohio) / Love
nickmeier1's comment : hahahahah I'm sooo sorry but that's hilarious!
by oouchh / 07/24/2011 at 8:22am / United Kingdom (Milton Keynes) / Love
digitalcadenza's comment : doesn't justify the cheating.
by painful / 07/24/2011 at 4:55am / Norway (Akershus) / Transportation
Today, I went skinny dipping with my friends. A security man drove up the dock we were on with his bike. After informing us that the dock was closed, and noticing all of our swimsuits on the dock, he refused to move his flashlight beam from us in the water. FML
by Men '86 / 07/24/2011 at 2:41am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous
by Username / 07/24/2011 at 2:22am / United States (California) / Health
Today, I was riding on my bike when I saw a homeless guy holding a sign saying, "Need money, stranded from Oklahoma." I decided to be nice, and hopped off my bike to give him $2. He took the money, and then jacked my bike. FML
by Joe thomas / 07/24/2011 at 12:22am / United States (Florida) / Money
by assante2010 / 07/23/2011 at 8:09pm / United States (Maine) / Love
Today, I was directing traffic at work during one of the hottest days of the year. Not only do I have to stand in the heat and exhaust fumes for minimum wage, I also had to endure people asking me "Aren't you hot?" as they drove past me in their air conditioned cars. FML
by Sarah / 07/23/2011 at 8:01pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work
Today, my constant bragging to friends caught up with me, and everyone believes I'm a swinger. Because of this, no girl wants to go out with me, in case they become just another notch under my belt. The truth is, I'm still a virgin. FML
by Anonymous / 07/23/2011 at 7:53pm / United States / Love
Today, I was doing swimming practice at the pool. I suddenly got breathless, dizzy, and felt like I was drowning. I cried out to the instructor, telling him I had a weak heart. He shouted back, "I don't care about your girlfriend's problems! Swim, bitch!" FML
by Norah / 07/23/2011 at 5:50pm / United States / Transportation
Today, I was walking to the store when I ran into one of my friends. He said he heard about my bike being stolen the day before, and that whoever took it was a heartless dick. I hadn't told anyone about the theft. FML
by Username / 07/23/2011 at 5:27pm / United States / Miscellaneous