Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Today, my boyfriend told me he hasn't showered since our first date. We've been dating for three weeks. FML

#7541798
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29803) - you deserved it (4315)

On 01/24/2010 at 10:27am - misc - by unknown - Sent from mobile version

Today, after reading a sign at the airport, my 6-year-old son thought it would be funny to yell, "Daddy's got a bomb!" Airport security then tackled me to the ground. Oh, and I missed my flight and my mother's birthday. FML

#7541135
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40737) - you deserved it (3191)

On 01/24/2010 at 9:25am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went to get my friend a drink while she sat in the lounge watching TV with my dog. When I came back, I found her licking my dogs ears. She said he dared her to do it. FML

#7540376
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26288) - you deserved it (2975)

On 01/24/2010 at 7:28am - animals - by CheeseMonsters (woman) - United Kingdom (Reading)

Today, I found out that my boyfriend isn't gay. Apparently, I just give good head. FML

#7538814
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24611) - you deserved it (6594)

On 01/24/2010 at 3:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

yakturk43's comment : receiving is just as gay he's in denial...

See all the comments →

Today, my friends and I went camping. In the middle of the night, they carried me deep into the forest and left me there. I stepped on a beehive as I walked back to the tent. FML

#7538757
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25192) - you deserved it (2682)

On 01/24/2010 at 3:50am - health - by Schrewt - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went down to my grandparents' house to spend some time with them. I was in the guest room when I noticed a box in the corner of the closet labelled "Crap". I opened up the box to see my Dad's John Elway Autographed Football in it. I got it for him for Christmas, it cost me $600. FML

#7536957
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27241) - you deserved it (2404)

On 01/24/2010 at 2:00am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was at the store when I ran into an old friend from high school. He didn't recognize me at first, but when I told him who I was, he instantly shouted "Oh! Yeah! The fat chick from Mr. H's class!" FML

#7535757
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24625) - you deserved it (3848)

On 01/24/2010 at 1:03am - misc - by unluckymiss (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to a Japanese restaurant. While the chef is throwing food at us, I'm getting ready for my turn. He tosses the piece of broccoli at me, I lean back to catch it, completely falling off my chair. I knocked everything over and had the packed restaurant laughing at me. FML

#7534746
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18900) - you deserved it (6681)

On 01/24/2010 at 12:21am - misc - by ashley_skillz06 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I woke up to a text from my boyfriend that said "Dude, I think she knows I'm going to break up with her." FML

#7534728
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33668) - you deserved it (2440)

On 01/24/2010 at 12:21am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got a call from the girl I'd really like to date to meet up for drinks. Excited, I walked out my front door, slipped on a patch of ice, and dislocated my shoulder. She won't go out on a date with me now because I "ditched her". FML

#7534159
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26682) - you deserved it (2501)

On 01/24/2010 at 12:01am - love - by pogodrake (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, when I logged onto facebook, I discovered a friend request from my ex who broke up with me and deleted me months ago. Upon adding her, I was taken to her profile where I saw dozens of status updates talking about how much she loves her new boyfriend, who she dumped me for. FML

#7531653
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21552) - you deserved it (8733)

On 01/23/2010 at 10:29pm - love - by lmiller (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was pondering the meaning of life - why I'm here, why anyone is here, why go on, and whether it's worth it... Then it hit me. The football in the head, not the meaning of life. FML

#7529834
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10863) - you deserved it (22477)

On 01/23/2010 at 9:14pm - misc - by ceedee - United States (California)

Today, my little brother learned to write his name. How did he tell the family? By writing it in permanent marker all over my 100 year old piano. FML

#7527132
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32543) - you deserved it (2361)

On 01/23/2010 at 7:26pm - kids - by onemoreruinedthing (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: