By Anonymous / Saturday 6 October 2012 23:04 / United States

Today, I had to pry my sister's used tampon out from between my dog's jaws. FML

By banj0 - / Saturday 6 October 2012 22:58 / United States - Madison

Today, I was fiddling around with the thermostat at my new place. For a laugh, I twisted the knob all the way to 40° celsius, when it snapped off. I don't have a clue how to fix it. FML

By didntknowyoucouldbreakit - / Saturday 6 October 2012 20:29 / New Zealand - Auckland
By Anonymous - / Saturday 6 October 2012 18:27 / Philippines - Sucat

Today, a co-worker gave me a couple of CDs he said he wanted me to listen to. I got excited, thinking that they were playlists he'd made for me. They were self-help tracks. FML

By The Last Cockbender - / Saturday 6 October 2012 17:09 / United Kingdom - London
By FML_Elle / Saturday 6 October 2012 15:52 / United States
By Jex - / Saturday 6 October 2012 10:04 / United Kingdom - London
FML - The follow-up

Today, I wore a dress that I bought last weekend to work, thinking how I liked it and it fitted me perfectly, until someone at work told me that I was actually wearing a nightie. FML

Valentine_Beauty Say more :
Hi yeah i know a lot of ya'll are thinking of how dumb am i to wear a nightie and not know the difference..for one thing, it was sold with other dresses and no it's not see through, it actually has an underskirt and the reason my colleague commented was due to the lacy neckline.. and i actually paired it off with a slacks and a cardigan, so no, i'm not working in a brothel though that made me LOL...people...
By Valentine_Beauty - / Saturday 6 October 2012 08:58 / United States
FML - The follow-up
BusinessTurtle Say more :
OP here, I've changed my locks and moved across town and I really don't want to hire a lawyer.
By BusinessTurtle / Saturday 6 October 2012 07:49 / United States - Ames

Today, my four roommates and I contracted lice. While all our heads were slathered in mayonnaise and saran wrap, our building's fire alarm went off. FML

By EastOneTen / Saturday 6 October 2012 07:28 / United States
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