Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Today, I got married. My new husband wanted to carry me over the threshold of our apartment, but he couldn't pick me up. FML

#10922943
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19931) - you deserved it (29163)

On 06/02/2010 at 5:31pm - health - by Official_Person (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went shopping with my mother. I needed to use the toilet, so entered a restaurant. After I left the toilet, my mother, who was near the restaurant's entrance, called out and asked: "Did you flush it?" Everyone heard her. And I'm 22 years old. FML

#10918883
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29151) - you deserved it (3306)

On 06/02/2010 at 11:05am - misc - by Kagura - Turkey (Istanbul)

Today, my boyfriend was talking to me on the land line when his cell phone rang. He told me to wait "two seconds" while he talked to a classmate. Their "two second" conversation lasted ten minutes, and now I can hear the French Open on the TV in background. He forgot he was talking to me. FML

#10913904
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23063) - you deserved it (3925)

On 06/01/2010 at 10:34pm - misc - by chiclet - Sent from mobile version

Today, I realized my boyfriend makes the same noises in bed as he does when he's winning in Call of Duty. FML

#10911486
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35735) - you deserved it (5697)

On 06/01/2010 at 7:56pm - intimacy - by Amb (woman) - United States

Today, someone broke into my car to steal $1.50. FML

#10908235
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32587) - you deserved it (3413)

On 06/01/2010 at 2:47pm - money - by Brokeashell - United States

Today, I finally convinced my son to use the potty. Later, he saw a show on TV about a toilet monster. Now he's too scared to even step foot into the bathroom. Here's to another few months of diaper changes. FML

#10906568
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25233) - you deserved it (4198)

On 06/01/2010 at 12:43pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend and I decided it was finally time for both of us to have sex with each other. He kept his shoes on the whole time because he thought he had smelly feet. FML

#10906300
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31633) - you deserved it (5268)

On 06/01/2010 at 12:19pm - intimacy - by smellyfeet (woman) - United Kingdom (Wolverhampton)

Today, I went to the supermarket; it was taking me ages to walk home because of the heavy food bags. Halfway home, I realised I had gone in my car. I had to walk all the way back to get my car. FML

#10906033
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11100) - you deserved it (55167)

On 06/01/2010 at 11:59am - misc - by Lou (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I was watching a movie with my boyfriend and his parents, who I haven't known very long. I ended up falling asleep. That doesn't sound so bad, until I woke my drooling self up by snoring extremely loud. FML

#10903996
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24755) - you deserved it (5370)

On 06/01/2010 at 8:31am - misc - by girlllll (woman) - Denmark (Kobenhavn)

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be cute to try and pick me up while kissing, instead he tripped and slammed the back of my head on the corner of the wall. FML

#10903172
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32479) - you deserved it (4711)

On 06/01/2010 at 5:49am - love - by staciedee - United States (California)

Today, I waited in line at a drive-through behind a man for ten minutes. I got out of my car, cursed at him, and then asked him to give me one good reason why it would take that long to order. The man slowly explained to me that he had a stutter. FML

#10903041
420 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10914) - you deserved it (124347)

On 06/01/2010 at 5:18am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)



FML's blog

  • FML with pics? That's FML Pics
  • They say that a picture is worth a thousand words. We reckoned pictures could be worth 300 characters, which is why we launched FML Pics. The name says it all, really: it's an FML app, only with…

Monday 3 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: