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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, stood in line for hours to see the new Harry Potter. Unfortunately, once inside the theater, I was stuck in the bathroom with the runs for the entire length of the movie. FML

#13900927
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34135) - you deserved it (6818)

On 11/19/2010 at 4:20pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, after three weeks of my boss telling me how much he appreciates my hard work and has submitted my name up for a promotion, he called me into his office to announce I'm being laid off. FML

#13900225
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27407) - you deserved it (2217)

On 11/19/2010 at 2:38pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I came home and found a can of body spray. My parents get me a new scent whenever they go shopping, which is usually at least twice a week. They left a note: "Do you get it yet?" FML

#13899111
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9964) - you deserved it (33435)

On 11/19/2010 at 11:54am - health - by SODbeatlesMCRlp (man) - United States

Today, I sent a text to a guy I'd met over the weekend. He'd traveled 40 miles to my town for the date, so I picked up the tab for dinner. My text simply said, "Had a nice time. Looking forward to getting together again." His reply was, "When did you get so needy?" FML

#13898275
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29920) - you deserved it (3660)

On 11/19/2010 at 10:00am - love - by needfulthing - United States

Today, I got dumped after about a four year relationship. Feeling lonely and depressed, I posted on facebook, "is hurt, someone please text or call me." Then one of my cousins commented, "no one text him." His comment got 17 "likes." No one got in contact with me. FML

#13897942
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31672) - you deserved it (9259)

On 11/19/2010 at 8:55am - misc - by Tay Tay -

Today, I was putting my 2 year old to bed, and I began to sing to her. She reached up, put her finger over my lips, and said, "Shhh, Mommy." FML

#13896400
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40689) - you deserved it (13376)

On 11/19/2010 at 2:47am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, my ballet teacher decided to tell us, in detail, about the nasty staph infection she has on her boob. The whole time, she was scratching it. FML

#13895610
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30817) - you deserved it (2698)

On 11/19/2010 at 1:07am - health - by fightingkittens (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my house was broken into. Apparently, I have nothing good enough in my house to steal, so they took my cake. FML

#13894998
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29380) - you deserved it (3666)

On 11/19/2010 at 12:14am - misc - by Amanda -

Today, my boyfriend and I had great sex and afterward decided to take a shower together. He left the room to get some towels, so I went to the bathroom and wait. I walked out of his room wearing nothing but a thong and ran into his mom who had come home from work early. FML

#13894887
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15993) - you deserved it (31782)

On 11/19/2010 at 12:04am - intimacy - by kay_jay1819 (woman) - United States

Today, I was just about done with my late-night shift at Ralph's. As I was about to put up my "Closed Lane" sign, an elderly women starts putting items on the conveyor belt. The cost was $14.79, and she paid with pennies. It took her ages to count them all, and I wasn't being paid overtime. FML

#13893679
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29763) - you deserved it (3826)

On 11/18/2010 at 10:34pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I'm at work as a security guard. At a morgue. Why am I here? FML

#13893197
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29581) - you deserved it (5894)

On 11/18/2010 at 10:04pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to school in my brand new shirt. It was loose fitting and a bit thin, so I wore a sweatshirt on top, intending to take it in once inside. When I got to my seat, I took off my sweatshirt, but also took off my shirt with it, flashing my whole class. FML

#13889988
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30031) - you deserved it (11349)

On 11/18/2010 at 6:12pm - misc - by Amanda Ross - United States (Maryland)

Today, I woke up to my yard covered in snow, Christmas music playing loudly, and my noisy, obnoxious aunt and her three year old twin daughters playing and screaming. They're going to be living with us until after the winter holidays. It's only November 18th. FML

#13889656
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26631) - you deserved it (3721)

On 11/18/2010 at 5:33pm - misc - by The Christmas Grinch - Canada (British Columbia)



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