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Today, my boss was being a total asshole. While in the bathroom, he turned his back on me, so I gave him the finger, mouthed obscenities, and pantomimed stabbing him with a knife. He was looking in the mirror and saw everything. FML

#13947465
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9662) - you deserved it (62708)

On 11/23/2010 at 8:41am - work - by fired (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend of a year because I discovered she had been cheating on me. Her defense was, "It wouldn't be a problem if you were just OK with this." FML

#13946366
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35918) - you deserved it (2994)

On 11/23/2010 at 4:32am - intimacy - by anonymous -

Today, I told my boyfriend I wanted to see more of his passionate side. He pushed my head down towards his lap. FML

#13945313
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28815) - you deserved it (13602)

On 11/23/2010 at 1:50am - intimacy - by Username -

Today, I was asked out by a guy who is doing community service because he was caught peeping through windows. I was tempted to say yes. FML

#13945112
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13215) - you deserved it (25391)

On 11/23/2010 at 1:25am - love - by ohsosad (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I realized that 95% of my facebook friends added me only because they think my sisters are hot. FML

#13944368
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32449) - you deserved it (4374)

On 11/23/2010 at 12:22am - misc - by smallfrie32 -

Today, I went over to my mother-in-law's house to have dinner. I was excited she invited me, since I thought she didn't like me. I ended up hanging her Christmas lights in a snowstorm while they had s'mores by the fire. FML

#13943289
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28770) - you deserved it (4025)

On 11/22/2010 at 10:58pm - misc - by heronlydaughter (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, I went to use the public restroom. As I saw the toilet paper was out, I could see there was some hanging down from the other stall. As I went to grab it, I felt a hand grab mine and a voice ask seductively, "what were you reaching for?" FML

#13940137
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30476) - you deserved it (9544)

On 11/22/2010 at 7:18pm - misc - by reesemaster (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I admitted to my boyfriend of three years that I have been suffering from depression for a while now. He took it as a good time to dump me. FML

#13939076
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32619) - you deserved it (4179)

On 11/22/2010 at 5:39pm - love - by Username -

Today, my boyfriend walked out of the bathroom, informed me he'd accidentally peed on the floor, and told me I could clean it up when I get a chance. FML

#13939042
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31659) - you deserved it (5045)

On 11/22/2010 at 5:35pm - misc - by anti-peecleaner (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I told my husband that I wanted to take advantage of the alone time we would have while our kids are visiting my parents. My idea? A nice dinner out and kinky sex all night long. His idea? Chinese buffet and subsequent dutch ovens in bed. FML

#13938957
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27643) - you deserved it (3806)

On 11/22/2010 at 5:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went to get my hair highlighted at the salon. The salonist mixed up my blonde hair dye with some other girl's hot pink and violet dye. Now I look like a cheap hooker. FML

#13938370
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32852) - you deserved it (5196)

On 11/22/2010 at 4:14pm - misc - by linda (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend of over a year looked at me and said, "Sometimes I just want to hit you." FML

#13937694
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34132) - you deserved it (10543)

On 11/22/2010 at 2:52pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my doctor told me to buy some KY Jelly and a dildo to help "loosen me up" so sex isn't so painful. I haven't been able to have sex for 6 months because it hurts so badly, and now my doctor has basically told me to go fuck myself. FML

#13937569
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37528) - you deserved it (8102)

On 11/22/2010 at 2:36pm - intimacy - by painfulintercourse - Canada (British Columbia)



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