Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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Man or woman?

Today, I found out that the guy I like was only coming to my house to get closer to my brother. FML

#12492067
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35894) - you deserved it (3705)

On 08/13/2010 at 1:33am - love - by brother love - United Kingdom

Today, my husband fell for an online scam leaving us 1450.00 in the negative. We get paid tomorrow and most of our money is going to cover that debt. FML

#12489960
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32368) - you deserved it (7526)

On 08/13/2010 at 12:03am - money - by Relevance - United States

Today, while at work at a new job, my brother comes and takes my car. Along with all my money, my phone, and whatever else I had in my purse. His message to me through one of my co-workers was "walk home." FML

#12487392
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27794) - you deserved it (3286)

On 08/12/2010 at 10:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was showing my three year-old that going down the deck steps are perfectly safe. At the top, I tripped on my shoe and fell head first down every step. I now have five stitches and a three year old who won't go anywhere near the deck. FML

#12485958
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25118) - you deserved it (7785)

On 08/12/2010 at 9:06pm - misc - by Diana (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I was messing with my boyfriend in my basement. We are both virgins and he wanted to perform oral sex on me for the first time. Naked, we finally decided to try to have sex. We discovered the act is much harder than it may seem. We're both still virgins. FML

#12485840
360 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31299) - you deserved it (36126)

On 08/12/2010 at 9:01pm - intimacy - by Blueberrypicc (woman) - United States (Ohio)

jimmyrules's comment : Lol I'm pretty sure it's not that hard.

See all the comments →

Today, I was installing TVs in a hospital. When I knocked on a door, a female voice asked me to come in. I opened the door to see an 80 year old woman standing in front of me, naked. She then complained when I hesitated to help her to put some clothes on. FML

#12483981
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27779) - you deserved it (2552)

On 08/12/2010 at 7:21pm - misc - by Olorin (man) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, I thought it would be funny to moon people out of my friend's car window. I rolled down the window and mooned a random couple. You should have seen the looks on their faces when I had to get out of the car and pick up my phone and wallet, which were in my back pocket. FML

#12483686
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5497) - you deserved it (53788)

On 08/12/2010 at 7:05pm - misc - by fullmoonfml (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I spent forty minutes trying to break into my own house after being locked out. After finally getting in through a small unlocked window, I discovered my keys in my pants pocket. FML

#12481000
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8837) - you deserved it (41796)

On 08/12/2010 at 4:33pm - misc - by Jason (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend's mom and dad walked in on us while we were playing naked twister. FML

#12476862
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20678) - you deserved it (33933)

On 08/12/2010 at 12:19pm - intimacy - by FML (man) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I got back from a 3 and a half week trip to South Africa to do volunteer work with children in townships. My parents forgot to pick me up, and I had to sit there by myself and wait for them, while 80 people of the same organization got loving hugs from their proud parents. FML

#12475653
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36276) - you deserved it (3319)

On 08/12/2010 at 10:50am - work - by leonieNL (woman) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, I heard my parents having sex. It wouldn't have been so bad if we weren't in the same hotel room. They thought I was asleep. FML

#12474079
255 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45726) - you deserved it (3509)

On 08/12/2010 at 8:02am - intimacy - by ScarredEars - United States

Today, while at my friend's house, I noticed her brother had a bit of an accent. I laughingly said "Is it me or does your little brother have an accent?" She stared and replied with "No, he has autism." FML

#12473698
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14792) - you deserved it (44168)

On 08/12/2010 at 7:00am - misc - by kggggg - United States (Nevada)

Today, I went on a trip with some people from work to watch a baseball game. Halfway through the game, one of my managers shook my hand and said "Nice to Meet You." I've been working there for 3 months. FML

#12472687
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26660) - you deserved it (4284)

On 08/12/2010 at 5:03am - work - by skyphoenix (man) - United States (Michigan)



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