Today, I was using the bathroom in a department store. When I was finished, I couldn't get the stall door open. I am claustrophobic and I freaked out and and started shouting for help. A 6 year old boy got the door open for me. It turns out I was pushing when I should have been pulling. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6786) - you deserved it (35231)
On 06/18/2009 at 9:33pm - misc - by ToiletTony (man) - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I was browsing my computer to find naked pictures of my ex-girlfriend. I decided it'd be funny to photoshop a penis onto one of the pictures. I'm straight and the new picture turned me on more than before. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9397) - you deserved it (45689)
On 06/18/2009 at 7:39pm - love - by AlexK (man) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)
Today, I used my inhaler for the first time in a year. As soon as I took a puff I felt something strange go down my throat. Upon closer inspection I discovered there had been a spider living in the mouth of my inhaler... and I had just swallowed it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39438) - you deserved it (6939)
On 06/18/2009 at 7:07pm - health - by asthmatic (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I flew into LAX. I get nervous when I fly so I brought my recently deceased dad's ashes with me in my purse. They're in a quarter sized urn which is melted shut. Security didn't believe it contained ashes so they broke it open spilling my dad all over the table. Sorry Daddy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (83418) - you deserved it (22774)
On 06/18/2009 at 5:29pm - misc - by CaliGirl (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I went to the store to buy some groceries. While I was at the store, an employee came up to me and said, "You're beautiful!" When I came home I told my husband what had just happened. My husband then asked, "What was wrong with him?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (42542) - you deserved it (3752)
On 06/18/2009 at 3:40pm - love - by Ann (woman) - United States (Nevada)
Today, after a month of planning, I started to tease my boyfriend of 3 years about the wonderful anniversary plans I had made for us. It was a secret, so I let him try and guess. He said "As long as its not a spa day. that would suck I would never go." It's a spa day. That I've already paid for. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31601) - you deserved it (17907)
On 06/18/2009 at 2:34pm - love - by Lvdkinda (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was riding the bus home from the Verizon store after getting my brand new EnV Touch. I was taking pictures with it when I noticed a woman with very nice boobs. I zoomed in to get a better picture when she looked at me with a disgusted face. The external display was on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4766) - you deserved it (67894)
On 06/18/2009 at 2:12pm - misc - by heythurr234 (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I went to the bank to make a withdrawal in order to celebrate my last day here in Italy with my friends. Apparently I'm overdrawn by 187 dollars so I'm eating nothing but leftover stale crackers to survive until I get free plane food on my way back home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9570) - you deserved it (32676)
On 06/18/2009 at 12:11pm - money - by JP (woman) - Italy (Lombardia)
Today, my girlfriend of ten months sent me a picture message of her making out with a guy. Under it, it read "you can pick your stuff up in the morning." FML
I agree, your life sucks (76438) - you deserved it (3472)
On 06/18/2009 at 11:08am - intimacy - by larvagirl23 (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was driving in my car when out of the corner of my eye I notice a car pulling up next to me trying to get past me. I speed up, so as not to let the car pass me. It took me a while before I noticed I was racing against the shadow of my own car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5914) - you deserved it (53134)
On 06/18/2009 at 10:15am - misc - by nerd (woman) - Finland (Eastern Finland)
Today, I saw my crush walking on the other side of the street. She hadn't noticed me, so when she did I nonchalantly looked over and casually waved to look cool. I then walked right into a lamp post. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16866) - you deserved it (25431)
On 06/18/2009 at 10:04am - misc - by anonymous (man) - Norway (Akershus)
Today, my wife and I were out with another couple we're friends with. When we went back to their house we looked at old pictures. They showed us a great picture, and I said "It would've been a lot better if that fat chick didn't ruin it in the background." It was the woman from the couple. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5742) - you deserved it (43485)
On 06/18/2009 at 9:33am - misc - by stelno - United States (Michigan)
Today, I decided to use fake tan, seeing as I am so pale. Everywhere I have been today, I have had children behind me. Singing the Oompa Loompa song. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11162) - you deserved it (51529)
On 06/18/2009 at 9:32am - misc - by OompaLoompa (woman) - United Kingdom
Monday 20 May 2013
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