Today, my wife, who is four months pregnant, burst into tears while thinking about the armchair in our living room that we never use. According to her, we're stopping it from living out its destiny as an armchair. FML
by FauteuilEver Alone / 07/05/2012 at 4:11am / France / Miscellaneous
noshatsherlockk's comment : That chair had hopes and dreams.
by Anonymous / 07/05/2012 at 12:01am / Canada (Ontario) / Kids
Today, I walked into my roommate's room to ask him a question, only to see a pitcher with over a pint of urine in it sitting on his bookcase. This is at least the fifth conversation in a year I've had with him about not peeing in containers in his room. FML
by notestojenn / 07/04/2012 at 10:55pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Miscellaneous
Today, what started as my mom calling my grandma for a recipe turned into them discussing the philosophical reason behind my baking. I apparently picked up baking because I'm depressed over unemployment. And here I thought I just liked the smell of baked goods. FML
by Shortcake / 07/04/2012 at 9:48pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I bought a home at a bargain. It will need 5 grand in repairs to fix plumbing and electric, but it's mine. When I pulled up the listing to show pictures to my friends, there was a new listing that was in the same neighborhood, and a larger, nicer house that is move in ready. Same price. FML
Today, I called my mom to see how she was doing. She quickly hijacked the conversation and said that she's signed me up for a dating site, because she feels bad that I can't find a decent man. I've been dating my boyfriend for seven months, and she's seen me with him multiple times. FML
by Anonymous / 07/04/2012 at 2:01pm / United States / Love
TazInYourPantz's comment : Key word, here, perhaps: 'decent'.
by Anonymous / 07/04/2012 at 1:01pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
perdix's comment : If you have a big dick, it's narcissistic. If you have a little winky, it's hilarious!
by Anonymous / 07/04/2012 at 12:41pm / United States (Colorado) / Work
by Anonymous / 07/04/2012 at 12:40pm / Canada (Prince Edward Island) / Intimacy
by anonymous / 07/04/2012 at 10:45am / United States / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 07/04/2012 at 9:48am / Canada (Ontario) / Health
by magicman / 07/04/2012 at 5:04am / United States / Health
by LonelyShowers / 07/04/2012 at 1:36am / United States (California) / Love
- 1Today, my parents let me babysit my baby sister for the first time. About an hour after they left,… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had…