Today, I locked my car. I put the key in my bag when suddenly my car began to roll backwards. I tried to get the key out of my bag but couldn't find it, and with the other hand I tried to stop the car. The worst thing was that some dumbass was watching me and didn't help. FML
by rabbitoncocaine / 04/20/2012 at 2:41am / Germany (Thuringen) / Transportation
MrTittySprinkles's comment : I fail to see how he's the dumbass in this situation.
by Anonymous / 04/19/2012 at 9:26pm / United States / Love
by WTF? / 04/19/2012 at 8:12pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by anonymous / 04/19/2012 at 6:33pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
by caaarl / 04/19/2012 at 3:46pm / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Love
SkoomaKi's comment : *sigh* It seems you can't escape duck faces anywhere. That stupid face ruins any photo.
by noooo!!! / 04/19/2012 at 2:45pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by amber / 04/19/2012 at 2:00pm / United States (Minnesota) / Love
by ajnmegs / 04/19/2012 at 12:08pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 04/19/2012 at 10:14am / Ireland (Dublin) / Miscellaneous
Today, I traveled by plane for the first time. Once in the air, I was absolutely terrorized by the whole experience. Luckily, they had free booze on board, so I necked some to steady my nerves. Unfortunately, the vodka mixed with air turbulence made me spurt some vomit into my lap. FML
by Burp / 04/19/2012 at 8:37am / United States / Health
by MI3 / 04/19/2012 at 3:34am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
candiicane's comment : Where does that even come from?
Today, someone burgled my hotel room. As always, I had locked my passport, extra cash, and other valuables in the closet safe, so I thought the losses would be superficial. What a discovery that the safe hadn't been fastened to the closet shelf, so the thief just picked it up and took it home. FML
by Anonymous / 04/19/2012 at 2:24am / Money
Today, I finally asked some friends to read the beginning of a novel that I'd been slaving away at. One of them said it was the literary equivalent of aquarium gravel. Another asked if I'd been sniffing boot polish while writing it. FML
by Anonymous / 04/19/2012 at 12:46am / United States (Nevada) / Work