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Today, while using the restroom at work, I dropped my keys into the toilet. I left to find something to get them out and figured nobody would use a toilet with keys in it. I came back to a bowl of dung and "Shit happens" written on the wall in lipstick. FML

#16980115
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31930) - you deserved it (7595)

On 07/05/2011 at 12:04am - work - by Stacy - United States

LadyClarik's comment : At least it wasn't written in shit....

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Today, I looked out my window to see the sunset, but instead I see my neighbor dancing with strobe lights on and music blasting. He was by himself and had absolutely nothing on. FML

#16978964
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30796) - you deserved it (3982)

On 07/04/2011 at 10:38pm - intimacy - by danam - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was jamming out in my car, tapping my fingers on the wheel and bobbing my head. At the next stoplight, I happened to look over and the passenger of the car next to me was holding a sign in the window saying, "I bet you don't have a boyfriend, do you?" FML

#16977432
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31341) - you deserved it (6032)

On 07/04/2011 at 8:25pm - misc - by brittbrat4 - United States

Keyman1212's comment : Fuck them! Enjoy your life (:

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Today, my bedridden mother called me selfish. After an operation two weeks ago, all I've done is feed her, clean her and the house every day. She called me selfish because I couldn't lift a TV into her room. FML

#16977173
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31700) - you deserved it (2350)

On 07/04/2011 at 8:00pm - misc - by Ashleighx94 - United Kingdom

Today, my fiancé broke off our engagement after he saw one of my baby pictures. He said our future kids just wouldn't look right. FML

#16976984
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40197) - you deserved it (3136)

On 07/04/2011 at 7:42pm - kids - by K3you - United States (Florida)

Today, I went on a blind date. Right after I arrived there, he excused himself to go to the bathroom. He never came back. FML

#16974687
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35908) - you deserved it (4760)

On 07/04/2011 at 4:07pm - misc - by rejecteddd (woman) - United States (New York)

Haha_oh_wait's comment : Maybe he got lost. Afterall he is blind.

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Today, my mom said we are having a party for the 4th of July. Her definition of a party is my grandma coming over. FML

#16974064
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28542) - you deserved it (3657)

On 07/04/2011 at 3:06pm - misc - by Kate - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got cock-blocked by the laundry. My boyfriend was the one who wanted to do laundry. FML

#16972353
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27132) - you deserved it (4265)

On 07/04/2011 at 12:09pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my girlfriend's ex punched me so hard in the face, I couldn't see straight. But I got up anyway. I lunged at him, and nailed him in the jaw. Turns out I'd in fact just knocked out my girlfriend the on-looker. FML

#16972351
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30025) - you deserved it (13844)

On 07/04/2011 at 12:09pm - health - by hero to zero - United States (New York)

Today, I finished reading a book about the treatment of mental patients and decided to use some of the strategies on my dad. We've never gotten along better. FML

#16971210
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33500) - you deserved it (4016)

On 07/04/2011 at 9:24am - misc - by Bekah (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, while working as a cashier at McDonald's, a man came in telling me that he had not received his hamburger. I looked at his receipt and the date said 11/17/09. FML

#16970431
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32703) - you deserved it (3502)

On 07/04/2011 at 5:42am - work - by crudofalife - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out that the 2 loud "firework booms" I heard were actually a guy shooting his dog on the unfinished road behind my house. FML

#16970335
307 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39684) - you deserved it (2764)

On 07/04/2011 at 5:11am - animals - by oopsies - United States

Today, for breakfast, there were scrambled eggs, boiled eggs, bacon, sausages, fresh bread, croissants, brownies, donuts, fruit smoothie, coffee, tea and orange juice. Too bad no one bothered wake me up. FML

#16969681
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36075) - you deserved it (9657)

On 07/04/2011 at 3:27am - misc - by Gustav Fjorder - Switzerland



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