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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I randomly got a boner while modeling a character's butt in animation class. FML

#21520891
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17660) - you deserved it (3203)

On 01/29/2016 at 5:53pm - misc - by Why (man) -

shinikageWolf's comment : Must have made a really great ass then.

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Today, my whack job of a father told my 8-year-old son that his cat deserves a bullet to the head for being so damn stupid. FML

Today, I'm doing an architecture course in China. My boss asked me to create a lamp shaped like a shrimp. FML

#21521055
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17562) - you deserved it (2146) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/29/2016 at 5:38pm - work - by Anonyme - China (Shanghai)

Today, I went out clubbing and hit the dance floor, hoping to impress some girls with my moves. All I got was a bunch of weird looks and was told by one girl that I'm the "whitest black guy" she's ever seen. FML

#21520882
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18648) - you deserved it (3250)

On 01/29/2016 at 5:18pm - misc - by I Tried (man) - United States (Texas)

RageWolf16's comment : It probably doesn't help that you say stuff like "impress some girls with my moves".

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Today, my girlfriend lost one of her rings. I found this out as I overheard her gushing to her friend about how I must have borrowed it to find out what her ring size is. I have zero interest whatsoever in the sick and utterly immoral institution of marriage. FML

#21520859
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11601) - you deserved it (24577)

On 01/29/2016 at 4:19pm - love - by ALL PRAISE TO THE NIGHT MOTHER (man) - United States (New York)

chuka81's comment : First, the fact that you don't like marriage doesn't make it sick or immoral. Second unless you have made it amply clear to your partner that you don't ever want to get married, they are entitled to think that if things go well, the relationship will eventually lead to marriage. Your girlfriend seems oblivious of the fact that you're so anti-marriage, so it's a Fuck her life from me

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Today, I was feeling terrible and posted on Facebook about how I was stressed out and feeling really lonely. My sister replied saying "#fatfuckproblems". 13 people liked it and some so-called friends posted stuff like "rekt" and "SLAYED, bitch!", all in less than a minute. FML

#21520812
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18560) - you deserved it (4178)

On 01/29/2016 at 2:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I walked in on one of my co-workers jerking off in the bathroom, complete with heavy breathing and victory groans. I don't want to go to HR, but I can't even look at him anymore. We have to work on a project together next week. FML

#21520798
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20154) - you deserved it (1636)

On 01/29/2016 at 1:36pm - work - by Sandman2015 (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, I had to teach my 16-year-old brother how to use a toaster. He thought you just plug it in and wait for it to "pre-heat." FML

#21520751
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18174) - you deserved it (1512)

On 01/29/2016 at 11:20am - misc - by whatarethisss - United States (Indiana)

Today, I got let go from my job, because my personal cell phone doesn't always have signal, so I missed an important call from work. My contract specifically said I'd get a work phone, which never happened. FML

#21520740
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20170) - you deserved it (1427)

On 01/29/2016 at 10:54am - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I received yet another letter from a relative bitching me out for not involving my parents in my wedding. The parents who showed no interest in our relationship and then yelled at my fiancé and me when we announced it to them, calling us stupid, naive, heathens, and mentally ill. FML

#21520696
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22688) - you deserved it (1504)

On 01/29/2016 at 7:51am - misc - by TheyObjectToTheUnholyUnion - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I got call from the manager for a company I applied for. Turns out, he mixed up my friend's phone number with mine, since we applied on the same day, so the manager accidentally hired her instead of me. He said the position is still mine if I want it, but they will have to let her go. FML

Today, after weeks of debating with myself, I finally got the courage to ask out my best friend of 9 years. She turned me down, saying that dating me would be like adopting a puppy, and she doesn't want that kind of responsibility. FML

Today, I started a new job. After being trained on several obscure computer programs I'm expected to use in just one day, my new boss informed me she's going on a week long vacation starting tomorrow. She's the only other person who knows how this program runs. FML

#21520497
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19178) - you deserved it (1361)

On 01/28/2016 at 6:39pm - work - by screwedfortheweek (woman) - United States (Indiana)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

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