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Man or woman?

Today, I decided to buy my Chinese Studies professor a gift from Taiwan. So I bought her a mini-Taiwanese passport that said "Republic of China" on it. As it turns out, it was actually a two-pack of travel condoms. FML

#11873804
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30012) - you deserved it (20526)

On 07/14/2010 at 11:17am - intimacy - by safetyfirst (man) - Taiwan (T'ai-pei)

Today, I was at a friend's house. She has one of those automatic air fresheners, and I was amazed when it went off. To get a better look at it, I got real close to it. I saw a button and pressed it. The air freshener went off again, spraying nothing but my eye. FML

#11867771
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8520) - you deserved it (64680)

On 07/14/2010 at 2:14am - misc - by Eyefreshener (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I made brownies for my co-workers. My boss called me into his office, and I though he was going to compliment me on the baking. Instead, he talked about how his 5-year-old daughter can make brownies better than me. FML

#11867757
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33872) - you deserved it (5957)

On 07/14/2010 at 2:14am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend told me that we should take a break from our relationship, because it'd be best for the both of us. Later, I found out that she really meant it'd be best for her and her new boyfriend. FML

#11866175
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40198) - you deserved it (3458)

On 07/14/2010 at 1:08am - love - by Depressed (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I've recently gained weight so I bought an exercise video. I started it right away in my room on the top floor. My younger sister screamed and ran outside a few minutes later. She thought it was an earthquake. FML

#11865183
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37615) - you deserved it (9869)

On 07/14/2010 at 12:32am - health - by sarah - United States

Today, I decided not to go on Facebook so people would actually think that I have a life. FML

#11864546
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15780) - you deserved it (31291)

On 07/14/2010 at 12:09am - misc - by No.Life. - United States (Vermont)

Today, I accidentally filled the lemonade machine with margarita mix that already had the tequila mixed in. It was served to three kids before anyone figured it out. FML

#11861261
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12567) - you deserved it (40832)

On 07/13/2010 at 10:10pm - work - by magnolia (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I put the vacuum cleaner hose against my neck to give me a hickey, so that it would look like I got some action. FML

#11859279
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26460) - you deserved it (43540)

On 07/13/2010 at 8:33pm - intimacy - by allalone - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend hacked my facebook account and set my status to say that I was in love with my boss. Seeing the post, my boss called me into his office, and told me he loved me too... FML

#11858705
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54398) - you deserved it (4513)

On 07/13/2010 at 8:02pm - work - by Camille (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I got a speeding ticket. I wrote a check, and on the way to deposit my fine, I got another one. I put both fines in a box down town, and I turned around to see a cop putting a parking ticket under my wind-shield wiper. FML

#11857753
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21008) - you deserved it (47318)

On 07/13/2010 at 7:15pm - misc - by Criminal (man) - United States (South Dakota)

Today, hoping to avoid the rain because I had just gotten an expensive perm, I ducked under an awning. At that moment, the store manager shook the awning, and about 6 hours of rain dumped on my head. FML

#11853841
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34626) - you deserved it (8189)

On 07/13/2010 at 3:43pm - misc - by dammitrain (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I slipped on the wet floor at work and sprained my wrist badly. I was carrying the wet floor sign so no one would slip. FML

#11852475
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34847) - you deserved it (6912)

On 07/13/2010 at 2:28pm - work - by babygirllxo - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I got my sister to pluck my eyebrows. She shaped them wrong, so now I look constantly sad. FML

#11849273
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19165) - you deserved it (28741)

On 07/13/2010 at 11:02am - misc - by OhNo - United Kingdom (Sheffield)



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