Today, my friend's son asked me how much coke costs in this place. I told him "about a dollar?" He said "wow, that's really cheap for blow." He's 10. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26936) - you deserved it (1896)
On 02/03/2009 at 6:55pm - kids - by Morgan (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, while surfing facebook I noticed someone in my network had recently shifted his relationship status from undeclared to "single." We've been dating exclusively for nine months. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22159) - you deserved it (1511)
On 02/03/2009 at 6:51pm - love - by Noname (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I had a sexy dream, woke up and started to masturbate quite vigorously. When I finished, I hopped off the top bunk naked to see my brother and his girlfriend laying in the bottom bunk. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12724) - you deserved it (36858)
On 02/03/2009 at 6:47pm - intimacy - by thermos (man) - United States (California)
Today, a woman walked out of the Humane Society with a cat carrier. I said, "Oh did you adopt him?" She walked past and started crying. She had just brought her cat in to be euthanized. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13210) - you deserved it (5847)
On 02/03/2009 at 6:19pm - animals - by Ves (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I walked in the snow and saw some kid slip. I laughed and felt good about myself. Then I fell. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3715) - you deserved it (54245)
On 02/03/2009 at 5:56pm - misc - by WestboroBC (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I found FML for the first time in class, and literally laughed out loud in the middle of the lecture in front of 200 classmates. Today's lecture? The cruelties of slavery. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22436) - you deserved it (20300)
On 02/03/2009 at 5:55pm - work - by kprice6 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I showed my boyfriend a picture of me in what I thought was a sexy skintight dress. He responded by saying "it's ok, I went through a pudgy stage too". The picture was from Saturday night. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21467) - you deserved it (2991)
On 02/03/2009 at 5:38pm - love - by Sam - United States (New York)
Today, when my boyfriend was about to orgasm, I suddenly sneezed all over his face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29290) - you deserved it (6715)
On 02/03/2009 at 5:16pm - intimacy - by Zippyzoo (woman) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, the police called because someone had turned in my wallet that was stolen. I happily drove home only to find that my house had been robbed and ransacked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37036) - you deserved it (1339)
On 02/03/2009 at 4:46pm - money - by fire0fisis - United States (Rhode Island)
Today, I walked in on my porn addicted roommate watching a gynecologist exam online. He asked me to watch it with him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35939) - you deserved it (2954)
On 02/03/2009 at 4:38pm - intimacy - by Escape! (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I was taking the elevator down with a group of people. It stopped on the 2nd floor and I said "What asshole can't take the steps from the 2nd floor?" Then a kid in a wheelchair got on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4484) - you deserved it (32943)
On 02/03/2009 at 3:30pm - misc - by j0natron (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, the only girl I'm friends with deleted my comment off of her profile because she was too embarrassed that people would see we were friends. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29886) - you deserved it (2467)
On 02/03/2009 at 3:27pm - misc - by sh33zy (man) - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, my 4 year old niece asked me why I didn't have a job or wife. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19615) - you deserved it (5343)
On 02/03/2009 at 3:25pm - misc - by Noname - United States (North Carolina)
Monday 20 May 2013
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